The following appeared in a memo from the owner of a chain of cheese stores located throughout the United States.
"For many years all the stores in our chain have stocked a wide variety of both domestic and imported cheeses. Last year, however, all of the five best-selling cheeses at our newest store were domestic cheddar cheeses from Wisconsin. Furthermore, a recent survey by Cheeses of the World magazine indicates an increasing preference for domestic cheeses among its subscribers. Since our company can reduce expenses by limiting inventory, the best way to improve profits in all of our stores is to discontinue stocking many of our varieties of imported cheese and concentrate primarily on domestic cheeses."
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation is likely to have the predicted result. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.
The author contends that to increase profits they should limit their inventory by focusing mainly on domestic cheeses as opposed to different varieties. He supports this assertion by citing the fact that the five best selling cheeses of their new store have all been domestic cheeses as well as the increased preference for domestic cheese amongst Cheeses of the World (Cheeses) subscribers. Whilst this argument may seem plausible at first glance, closer inspection reveals that there are many important questions that need to be addressed before the proposition can be enacted.
Firstly, the author assumes that sales of their new store can be generalized to all of the others. What are the top selling cheeses in the other stores? If the customers of the other stores do not prefer domestic cheeses it may not be wise for the company to make domestic cheese its main product. This is especially so if the sales generated by the other stores, outweigh that generated by the new store. Thus to strengthen the argument thye author must provide evidence to show that customers of their other stores prefer domestic cheeses as well.
Secondly, the author makes generalizations from the subscribers of one magazine. Why is it important that subscribers to Cheeses prefer domestic cheese. Is this magazine representative of all cheese consumers? What about subscribers to other magazines, why is Cheeses so important? All of these are important questions as one cannot assume that domestic cheese is growing in demand because of the results of one magazine. Furthermore, what was the sample size of the magazine survey? Is the survey itself even representative of Cheeses subscribers. All in all there is not enough information to conclude that domestic cheese is a profitable endeavor. To strengthen the argument the author must provide information which states that the survey is representative of Cheeses’ subscribers and that Cheeses subscribers are representative of cheese consumers (on a whole).
Lastly, the author contends that focusing on domestic cheese is the best way to increase profits however this is hard to believe as information about other alternatives are not provided . Is this without a doubt the best way to increase profits? What about cutting back on cost of production or costs of advertising? There are many different ways for a company to be more efficient and increase productivity, none of which have been mentioned in the author’s argument. To strengthen the argument the author must provide information about why other alternatives would not work as well as evidence that domestic cheeses is likely to increase sales and reduce costs. Unless this is provided one cannot rule out alternative strategies.
In conclusion there is not enough evidence to support a claim as bold as that of the author’s as key elements of the discussion have been left out. One must have knowledge of all aspects of a situation before statements can be made and as such, until important issues are addressed the argument resembles one of wishful thinking as opposed to a proposition that is likely to yield real world results.
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Sentence: Thus to strengthen the argument thye author must provide evidence to show that customers of their other stores prefer domestic cheeses as well.
Error: thye Suggestion: the
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condition 1:
Last year, however, all of the five best-selling cheeses at our newest store were domestic cheddar cheeses from Wisconsin. //you argument 1
condition 2:
Furthermore, a recent survey by Cheeses of the World magazine indicates an increasing preference for domestic cheeses among its subscribers. //your argument 2.
conclusion:
Since our company can reduce expenses by limiting inventory, the best way to improve profits in all of our stores is to discontinue stocking many of our varieties of imported cheese and concentrate primarily on domestic cheeses. //your argument 3, but not exactly:
suggested:
many consumers who are coming for a wide array of imported cheeses might stop coming to the store. If so, it is possible that the lost profit from those consumers may override the profit gains from the customers coming for the imported cheeses.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 1 2
No. of Sentences: 25 15
No. of Words: 510 350
No. of Characters: 2580 1500
No. of Different Words: 203 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.752 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.059 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.796 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 201 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 152 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 109 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 65 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 20.4 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.895 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.48 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.318 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.513 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.079 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5