The following recommendation was made by the president and administrative staff of Grove College, a private institution, to the college's governing committee.
"We recommend that Grove College preserve its century-old tradition of all-female education rather than admit men into its programs. It is true that a majority of faculty members voted in favor of coeducation, arguing that it would encourage more students to apply to Grove. But 80 percent of the students responding to a survey conducted by the student government wanted the school to remain all female, and over half of the alumnae who answered a separate survey also opposed coeducation. Keeping the college all female will improve morale among students and convince alumnae to keep supporting the college financially."
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation and the argument on which it is based are reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.
The president of Grove College suggests that keeping all female strategy will improve morale among students and convince alumnae to fund school persistently. However, there are some questions need answering.
Firstly, the writer suggests that 80 percent of the students responding to a survey conducted by the student government wanted to keep all female. Still, is the content of the survey valid? The content of the questionnaire could be biased. It asks keeping all female or recruiting the number of male students 4 times greater than that of female in Grove College. It is obviously scaring female students, because the change is so drastic that most students couldn't accept.
Furthermore, another question is, are students honest to answer the questions of a survey? It is possible that most students answering the survey would like to a good image to their teachers, so they lie and contradict to their will. Because the faculties want to keep all female for some reasons. Perhaps, the school is going to hire many teachers so as to meet the coeducation requirement, and the teachers worry they might loss their jobs because of the change.
Additionally, it claims that over half of the alumnae who answered another survey also opposed coeducation. Still, how many alumnae answer the survey? Probably, there are only 20 alumnae and half of them oppose the decision. And there are 2,000 students in Grove College. Therefore, it is barely to claim the survey would be enough representative. Even if it is enough representative, says 2000 of 4,000 alumnae opposing against the coeducation, while the others actually approve the new policy. In this case, it is hardly to claim the major opinion of alumnae would deny the coeducation. It is suggested to answer how many alumnae do they answer the questionnaire.
Moreover, the president proposes that keeping all female so as to improve morale among students and convince alumnae for financial reasons. Nevertheless, how much percentage of school income does come from alumnae? A probable explanation is that there is only 1 percent of the income from alumnae, thus, it contributes little to support the finance of the school. And because coeducation, the college could recruit male students and it brings additional 50 percent profit as much as the annual income of Grove College. Therefore, the coeducation could be more beneficial to the school instead of all female policy.
In conclusion, unless the president of the Grove College could answer the questions mentioned above, the readers could not believe in the argument.
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| 2023-03-05 | tedyang777 | 55 | view |
| 2022-10-09 | Soumyadip Kar 1729 | 53 | view |
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Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 25 15
No. of Words: 420 350
No. of Characters: 2106 1500
No. of Different Words: 187 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.527 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.014 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.636 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 174 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 121 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 70 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 41 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 16.8 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.794 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.64 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.309 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.309 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.101 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 1 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 456, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: couldn't
...change is so drastic that most students couldnt accept. Furthermore, another question ...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 349, Rule ID: SO_AS_TO[1]
Message: Use simply 'to'
Suggestion: to
...e school is going to hire many teachers so as to meet the coeducation requirement, and t...
^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 58, Rule ID: SO_AS_TO[1]
Message: Use simply 'to'
Suggestion: to
...sident proposes that keeping all female so as to improve morale among students and convi...
^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, also, but, first, firstly, furthermore, however, if, moreover, nevertheless, so, still, therefore, thus, while, as to, in conclusion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 19.0 19.6327345309 97% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 12.9520958084 93% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 11.1786427146 81% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 13.6137724551 66% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 26.0 28.8173652695 90% => OK
Preposition: 48.0 55.5748502994 86% => OK
Nominalization: 12.0 16.3942115768 73% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2165.0 2260.96107784 96% => OK
No of words: 419.0 441.139720559 95% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.16706443914 5.12650576532 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.52432199235 4.56307096286 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.77536387971 2.78398813304 100% => OK
Unique words: 195.0 204.123752495 96% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.465393794749 0.468620217663 99% => OK
syllable_count: 669.6 705.55239521 95% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 4.96107784431 161% => OK
Article: 9.0 8.76447105788 103% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 2.70958083832 185% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.67365269461 179% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.22255489022 47% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 25.0 19.7664670659 126% => OK
Sentence length: 16.0 22.8473053892 70% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 41.0633461861 57.8364921388 71% => OK
Chars per sentence: 86.6 119.503703932 72% => OK
Words per sentence: 16.76 23.324526521 72% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.68 5.70786347227 100% => OK
Paragraphs: 6.0 5.15768463074 116% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.25449101796 57% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 8.20758483034 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 6.88822355289 73% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 11.0 4.67664670659 235% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.120524762465 0.218282227539 55% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0363363869213 0.0743258471296 49% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0542327992588 0.0701772020484 77% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0879907594997 0.128457276422 68% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0572310970413 0.0628817314937 91% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.3 14.3799401198 79% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 55.24 48.3550499002 114% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 12.197005988 78% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.41 12.5979740519 99% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.9 8.32208582834 95% => OK
difficult_words: 92.0 98.500998004 93% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 6.0 12.3882235529 48% => Linsear_write_formula is low.
gunning_fog: 8.4 11.1389221557 75% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 11.9071856287 84% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.