In this statement the author asserted the new opening store will be very successful due the the Plainsvilles' specialty.
he noted that the sport-related business are very burgeoning and lucrative with several reasons, and the young children are also like sports and could be potential customers as the requirement of schools on sport program. There are some conflict and questions that I need to indicate.
FIrst of all, what I concern is given this area the sport-related business is so fast developing and promising, have there been healthy food stores already? On this point , the author did not mention the competetor in this area. Because the local healthy food business may be mature, once the Nature's Way cut in, I dout that if they can survive as a new-bee in Plainsville. In this case with high possibility, the new healthy store would confront violent competiton even debacle at this area.
What's more, let's discuss the healty food and other health-related products which the Nature's Way main business.In that the people in Plainsville empasize on keeping body fit, I doubt if they really need healthy food. On the other hand, if they really do, they must eat healthy food early , so how do they but them? The author did not mention this point which is significant to a new open store who sell them to find out how did their future customers buy them before.
In additon, the author noted children who said to be potential customers as the program given by the schools. I believe the shools program about keeping body fitness is a good course for the young children as they are growing up. But there are no obvioius evidence to prove these socalled potential buyers would eat healthy food instead of milk, eges and steaks.That is another point the author did not prove that the relevance betweenthe importance of young children taking healthy food and they will be stronger and healthier.
Another aspect that showed no relevance is the local merchants report. They said the sports shoes and clothes sold well. As my concern,form this observation we can conclude the local people like these shoes and clothes, while do not means they will like healthy food,too. In another word, the author do not shouw us the relevance between them.
In conclusion, the author should make a wide survey, including competitors condition and the local people's habitat about the healty food and sports
- TOEFL T P O 33 - Integrated Writing Task 3
- People attend college or university for many different reasons (for example, new experiences, career preparation, increased knowledge). Why do you think people attend college or university? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. 73
- Do you agree or disagree with the following statement: children should spend most of their time on studying and playing, they shouldn’t be required to help family with household chores, such as cleaning and cooking. 70
- do you agree or disagree with the following statement the university will spend money on dormitory to improve the life quality of students which of the following do you thin is the best way providing a room for quiet study building an exercise room p 94
- Educators should take students' interests into account when planning the content of the courses they teach.Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the recommendation and explain your reasoning for the position 66
Essay evaluation report
argument 1 -- not OK
argument 2 -- not OK
argument 3 -- not OK
--------------------
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: ??? out of 6
Category: Poor Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 17 15
No. of Words: 408 350
No. of Characters: 1947 1500
No. of Different Words: 203 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.494 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.772 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.448 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 131 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 100 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 59 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 37 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 24 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 12.348 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.529 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.331 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.611 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.127 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 6 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 89, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a word
Suggestion: the
...ening store will be very successful due the the Plainsvilles specialty. he noted that ...
^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 89, Rule ID: DT_DT[1]
Message: Maybe you need to remove one determiner so that only 'the' or 'the' is left.
Suggestion: the; the
...ening store will be very successful due the the Plainsvilles specialty. he noted that ...
^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: He
...ul due the the Plainsvilles specialty. he noted that the sport-related business a...
^^
Line 4, column 171, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...althy food stores already? On this point , the author did not mention the competet...
^^
Line 6, column 1, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: What's
...ompetiton even debacle at this area. Whats more, lets discuss the healty food and ...
^^^^^
Line 6, column 112, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: In
...cts which the Natures Way main business.In that the people in Plainsville empasize...
^^
Line 6, column 288, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...lly do, they must eat healthy food early , so how do they but them? The author did...
^^
Line 8, column 363, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: That
...y food instead of milk, eges and steaks.That is another point the author did not pro...
^^^^
Line 10, column 135, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , form
...oes and clothes sold well. As my concern,form this observation we can conclude the lo...
^^^^^
Line 10, column 234, Rule ID: DONT_NEEDS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'mean'?
Suggestion: mean
...e these shoes and clothes, while do not means they will like healthy food,too. In ano...
^^^^^
Line 10, column 267, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , too
...do not means they will like healthy food,too. In another word, the author do not sho...
^^^^
Line 12, column 100, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'peoples'' or 'people's'?
Suggestion: peoples'; people's
...ing competitors condition and the local peoples habitat about the healty food and sport...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, if, may, really, so, well, while, in conclusion, first of all, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 17.0 19.6327345309 87% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 13.0 12.9520958084 100% => OK
Conjunction : 15.0 11.1786427146 134% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 13.6137724551 81% => OK
Pronoun: 40.0 28.8173652695 139% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 36.0 55.5748502994 65% => OK
Nominalization: 11.0 16.3942115768 67% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2005.0 2260.96107784 89% => OK
No of words: 404.0 441.139720559 92% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.96287128713 5.12650576532 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.48327461151 4.56307096286 98% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.56304074285 2.78398813304 92% => OK
Unique words: 206.0 204.123752495 101% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.509900990099 0.468620217663 109% => OK
syllable_count: 594.0 705.55239521 84% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 4.96107784431 141% => OK
Article: 6.0 8.76447105788 68% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.70958083832 148% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 8.0 4.22255489022 189% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 19.7664670659 91% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 22.8473053892 96% => OK
Sentence length SD: 62.1656737087 57.8364921388 107% => OK
Chars per sentence: 111.388888889 119.503703932 93% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.4444444444 23.324526521 96% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.44444444444 5.70786347227 95% => OK
Paragraphs: 7.0 5.15768463074 136% => Less paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 12.0 5.25449101796 228% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 8.20758483034 134% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 6.88822355289 44% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.67664670659 86% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.168719720857 0.218282227539 77% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0514756504626 0.0743258471296 69% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0504846303225 0.0701772020484 72% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.082804310929 0.128457276422 64% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0501320098434 0.0628817314937 80% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.2 14.3799401198 92% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 57.61 48.3550499002 119% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 12.197005988 88% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.78 12.5979740519 94% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.85 8.32208582834 94% => OK
difficult_words: 80.0 98.500998004 81% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 12.3882235529 89% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 11.1389221557 97% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.9071856287 92% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Maximum six paragraphs wanted.
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.