Pirouettes Ballet School is the clear choice for any child. Of all the dance schools in Elmtown, Pirouettes has the most intensive program, and our teachers have danced in the most prestigious ballet companies all over the world. Many of our students have gone on to become professional dancers with top dance companies.
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation and the argument on which it is based are reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.
The author's claim and the reasons given to any position of statements are lacking proofs and evidences to accepts the facts connoted. There are many loop holes that have to be addressed, and without addressing those loop holes, the conclusions cannot be accepted. Hence, the statements stated by the author regarding opting the dance school in the Elmtown for any child cannot be accepted completely.
Firstly, the author is stating that Pirouettes Ballet school is the best school for any child in the Elmtown, since they are conducting intensive programs for the dance students. It may be likely that there may be no other dance schools in that town and hence one and only school present in that town which has gained popularity in teaching ballet. Since, it is not stated that the number of dance schools in the town, the author cannot conclude that Pirouettes Ballet dance school will be the best option.
Secondly, the author is stating that their teachers have danced in most prestigious companies all over the world. Here, on the first hand, the author has not stated the history of the teachers like had they started learning the dance in that school from the beginning, or are they from different dance schools and are later entry teachers to that school. It may be likely that they may be well dancers, and may be due to migration, they have settled in Elmtown and have joined that dance school to continue the teacher profession. Without this information it will be a facile to conclude that for any child Pirouettes Ballet School would be the best option since their teachers have danced in prestigious companies all over the world.
Thirdly, the author is also stating that many students have gone on to become professional dancers with top dance companies. Here also the history of the students has not given such as did the student start his dance training in that school?. It may also be likely that the student may have got attracted to the dance and wants to take up dance as a profession and hence have gone out worldly to enhance the dance knowledge. Since, as it is not stated that how Pirouettes Ballet School is influencing the students interests, it cannot be stated that due to the intensive programs conducted by the school are making them to go on to become professional dancers with top dance companies is not acceptable.
Thus, in total, the author's statement of positions cannot be considered in a single take. Still greater and deeper studies have to be made to say how the students are becoming good professionals in ballet due to intensive dance programs conducted by Pirouettes Ballet School
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2018-09-01 | ribhunirek | 34 | view |
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 16 15
No. of Words: 450 350
No. of Characters: 2140 1500
No. of Different Words: 170 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.606 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.756 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.42 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 154 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 100 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 69 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 43 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 28.125 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.652 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.688 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.401 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.625 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.115 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 107, Rule ID: TO_NON_BASE[1]
Message: The verb after "to" should be in the base form: 'accept'.
Suggestion: accept
...nts are lacking proofs and evidences to accepts the facts connoted. There are many loop...
^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 21, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...not acceptable. Thus, in total, the authors statement of positions cannot be consid...
^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 91, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Still,
... cannot be considered in a single take. Still greater and deeper studies have to be m...
^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, first, firstly, hence, if, may, regarding, second, secondly, so, still, third, thirdly, thus, well, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 30.0 19.6327345309 153% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 15.0 12.9520958084 116% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 11.1786427146 107% => OK
Relative clauses : 19.0 13.6137724551 140% => OK
Pronoun: 36.0 28.8173652695 125% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 56.0 55.5748502994 101% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 16.3942115768 30% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2188.0 2260.96107784 97% => OK
No of words: 450.0 441.139720559 102% => OK
Chars per words: 4.86222222222 5.12650576532 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.6057793516 4.56307096286 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.49108633153 2.78398813304 89% => OK
Unique words: 178.0 204.123752495 87% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.395555555556 0.468620217663 84% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 657.9 705.55239521 93% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 4.96107784431 121% => OK
Article: 9.0 8.76447105788 103% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 2.70958083832 74% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.67365269461 179% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.22255489022 95% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 16.0 19.7664670659 81% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 28.0 22.8473053892 123% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 47.6692707622 57.8364921388 82% => OK
Chars per sentence: 136.75 119.503703932 114% => OK
Words per sentence: 28.125 23.324526521 121% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.0625 5.70786347227 124% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.25449101796 57% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 8.20758483034 134% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 6.88822355289 29% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.67664670659 64% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.45263512897 0.218282227539 207% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.187715391959 0.0743258471296 253% => Sentence topic similarity is high.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.115178650362 0.0701772020484 164% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.277188351979 0.128457276422 216% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0938796889235 0.0628817314937 149% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.5 14.3799401198 108% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 51.52 48.3550499002 107% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.0 12.197005988 107% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.2 12.5979740519 89% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.83 8.32208582834 94% => OK
difficult_words: 80.0 98.500998004 81% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 12.3882235529 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 13.2 11.1389221557 119% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.9071856287 109% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.