Recent incursions by deep-sea fisherman into the habitat of the Madagascan shrimp have led to a significant reduction in the species population. With the breeding season fast approaching, the number of shrimp should soon begin to increase. Nonetheless, the population should not return to the levels before the fishing boats arrived. Because this trend is expected to continue over the next several years, the Madagascan shrimp will quickly become an endangered species.
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
The above argument describes the relation between the fishing habits and the population of Madagascan shrimp. The author asserts that these are negatively correlated as increase in the pace of one(fishing) leads to reduction of the other (population) and thus concludes that since the natural balance of the number of shrimp have been once disturbed, in coming future Madagascan shrimp will become endangered species . On the surface level, the argument seems valid and accurate but deeper scrutiny of facts provides the real picture that turn out this to be utterly flimsy and spurious.
First of all, author is completely wrong in describing that fishing is the only cause of reduction in number of shrimp. How can one refute there might be some natural calamity or sudden emergence of any disease or viral in sea water that lead to diminish their population. Till an apt picture of all related facts like natural scenario, health conditions etc be provided we can't accept that only fishing is the cause in fall of number of Madagascan shrimp.
Secondly, author has made prediction that even after the breeding season, due to fishing activities, the Madagascan shrimp will never attain the number in eco-system that they earlier had. In this regard, the author has extrapolated the result as with the passage of time, the fisherman start exploring for other breeds in spite of shrimps and that leads to upsurge in their population. Or in this regard, one can not deny that breeding season doesn't ensure that will lead to rise in population as there might emerge some problem during their incubation that leads to moribund eggs. Thus, deciding about the future course in present scenario yields dubious conclusion.
Last but not the least, a less number of shrimp doesn't indicate that they are going to be in category of endangered species. What if there are about one lac shrimp presently and after few years their number turned to be 7000, that doesn't indicate any threat to their breed. Thus, author should have mentioned the apt statistical figures if he wanted to make his results more appropriate and sturdy.
To conclude, the author have ignored certain aspects in absence of which any conclusion won't yield the appropriate result. Had the argument be based on certain valid hypothesis, facts and figures the result would have been reliable and valid.
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argument 1 -- not OK. Any way the amount is getting less.
argument 2 -- you put something new: 'the fisherman start exploring for other breeds in spite of shrimps and that leads to upsurge in their population.'
argument 3 -- OK
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read a sample:
http://www.testbig.com/gmatgre-essays/recent-incursions-deep-sea-fisher…
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 15 15
No. of Words: 395 350
No. of Characters: 1934 1500
No. of Different Words: 202 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.458 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.896 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.422 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 146 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 95 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 62 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 38 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 26.333 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.638 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.6 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.33 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.604 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.09 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5