“The Smith Corporation should not be permitted to develop the land that is now part of the Youngtown Wildlife Preserve. This sanctuary is essential to the survival of the 300 bird species that live in our area. Although only a small percentage of the land will be sold to Smith, the proposed development will have disastrous consequences for our area. The company plans to build a small hotel on the land. Although they have promised to ensure the preservation of the sanctuary, there is no way that their plans will do anything but harm the sanctuary. There are no circumstances under which this sale will benefit our community, which relies on tourists who visit.”
The authors conclusion of disastorous affect of developing hotel on bird species and community may be true, but is rife with assumptions.
Author has assumed that the 300 type of birds that live in Youngtown, lives in Youngtown Wildlife Preserve. It may be possible that the birds living in that area will not be present in Wildlife preserve and may be present somewhere else in the town. For instance, Birds may prefer to live near water reserve than in the wildlife preserve. Also author has assumed that selling a small percentage of the area will have impact on whole area. It may be possible that the land that is sold doesn't have any animals, birds etc. So, developing this kind of will not imapct either the wildlife or the residents of that place.
Moreover author has assumed that the plans made by the Smith corporation to conserve sanctuary will not succed which may be entirely false. For instance the Corpotion may have developed a plan to conserver the wildlife santuary in addition to the plan of building hotel. In such a case the coporation should share their plan on how they are saving the sanctuary and at the same time developing their hotel which will bring trust to the resident of that place.
Further, it will be non profitable for them also to destroy the bird species as no one will like to stay in the hotel from where they cannot enjoy the sancturay for which the place is famous for. Also author has assumed that the tourist come only for the birds. It may be possibel that some tourist come for other reason also such as monuments etc. Further, author has suggested that the hotel will not have fruitful results for the community which is entirely wrong. With the hotel near to wildlife preserve it will attact more tourist toward the city than before..
Wildlife preservation is important but if a coporation making plans to develop a place and promisiing to preserve the wildlife, the cause should not be hindered. But a detailed road may should be asked from the corporation not how they will conserve the birds and in the same time devlop there hotel.
- “The Smith Corporation should not be permitted to develop the land that is now part of the Youngtown Wildlife Preserve. This sanctuary is essential to the survival of the 300 bird species that live in our area. Although only a small percentage of the land 80
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- Some people believe that increasing violence in the media is the cause of increasing violence in our society, especially among children. Others believe that children's peer groups and parental role models are a much more influence on children's behavior. 75
Sentence: It may be possible that the land that is sold doesn't have any animals, birds etc. So, developing this kind of will not imapct either the wildlife or the residents of that place.
Error: imapct Suggestion: impact
Sentence: Moreover author has assumed that the plans made by the Smith corporation to conserve sanctuary will not succed which may be entirely false.
Error: succed Suggestion: succeed
Sentence: For instance the Corpotion may have developed a plan to conserver the wildlife santuary in addition to the plan of building hotel.
Error: santuary Suggestion: sanctuary
Error: conserver Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: In such a case the coporation should share their plan on how they are saving the sanctuary and at the same time developing their hotel which will bring trust to the resident of that place.
Error: coporation Suggestion: corporation
Sentence: Further, it will be non profitable for them also to destroy the bird species as no one will like to stay in the hotel from where they cannot enjoy the sancturay for which the place is famous for.
Error: sancturay Suggestion: sanctuary
Sentence: It may be possibel that some tourist come for other reason also such as monuments etc. Further, author has suggested that the hotel will not have fruitful results for the community which is entirely wrong.
Error: possibel Suggestion: possible
Sentence: With the hotel near to wildlife preserve it will attact more tourist toward the city than before..
Error: attact Suggestion: attack
Sentence: Wildlife preservation is important but if a coporation making plans to develop a place and promisiing to preserve the wildlife, the cause should not be hindered.
Error: coporation Suggestion: corporation
Error: promisiing Suggestion: promising
Sentence: But a detailed road may should be asked from the corporation not how they will conserve the birds and in the same time devlop there hotel.
Error: devlop Suggestion: develop
argument 1 -- OK.
argument 2 -- OK
argument 3 -- OK
flaws:
No. of Spelling Errors: 11 2
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 11 2
No. of Sentences: 15 15
No. of Words: 368 350
No. of Characters: 1692 1500
No. of Different Words: 167 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.38 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.598 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.332 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 103 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 79 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 59 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 29 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 24.533 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.771 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.8 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.376 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.615 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.104 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5