"Over the past two years, the number of shoppers in Central Plaza has been steadily decreasing while the popularity of skateboarding has increased dramatically. Many Central Plaza store owners believe that the decrease in their business is due to the number of skateboard users in the plaza. There has also been a dramatic increase in the amount of litter and vandalism throughout the plaza. Thus, we recommend that the city prohibit skateboarding in Central Plaza. If skateboarding is prohibited here, we predict that business in Central Plaza will return to its previously high levels."
The argument that if skateboarding is prohibited in central plaza to increase business in central plaza. Author mentioned that there is increase in the amount of litter and vandalism throughout the plaza. However conclusion is relies on evidence and there is no clear evidence there.
First, increase in number of skateboarder is affecting the business growth. It may be believable reason, for instance we would not to park vehicle in area where skateboarding is going on. Any kind on accidents can happen. So instead of that customer will prefer shop some other place.
Second, author mentioned about litter and vandalism. It seems that both of the things are unpleasant according to customer's view. Customer will not happy to drive to the area where is private, public property is getting violated, for example we always prefer to shop in pleasant area not in litter dropped area.
Third, there is possibility that other shopping centers may be providing variety of brands, facilities at their center which may not be available at center plaza. This would be the reason of decrease the business.
In conclusion skateboarding, litter, vandalism anyone could be the reason of business fall off. Store owners or Central plaza management must keep the area clean and vandalize free. They should prohibit skateboarder from shopping area and request government to provide them proper area for skateboarding. Owner and Plaza authorities must have concentrate on satisfaction of customers by providing variety of brands, facilities.
Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
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2015-06-23 | nishit1018 | 50 | view |
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Sentence: However conclusion is relies on evidence and there is no clear evidence there.
Description: The token is is not usually followed by a noun, plural, common
Suggestion: Refer to is and relies
Sentence: This would be the reason of decrease the business.
Description: The token of is not usually followed by a verb, base: uninflected present, imperative or infinitive
Suggestion: Refer to of and decrease
Sentence: In conclusion skateboarding, litter, vandalism anyone could be the reason of business fall off.
Description: The fragment business fall off is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace fall with verb, past tense
flaws:
No. of Words: 242 350
Minimum 250 words wanted.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 16 15
No. of Words: 242 350
No. of Characters: 1256 1500
No. of Different Words: 134 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 3.944 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.19 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.788 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 97 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 69 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 54 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 34 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 15.125 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.46 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.562 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.306 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.555 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.085 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5