A recently issued twenty-year study on headaches suffered by the residents of Mentia investigated the possible therapeutic effect of consuming salicylates. Salicylates are members of the same chemical family as aspirin, a medicine used to treat headaches. Although many foods are naturally rich in salicylates, food-processing companies also add salicylates to foods as preservatives. The twenty-year study found a correlation between the rise in the commercial use of salicylates and a steady decline in the average number of headaches reported by study participants. At the time when the study concluded, food-processing companies had just discovered that salicylates can also be used as flavor additives for foods, and, as a result, many companies plan to do so. Based on these study results, some health experts predict that residents of Mentia will suffer even fewer headaches in the future.
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the prediction and the argument on which it is based are reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the prediction.
In the given passage, the outcomes of the investigations, which have been done on headaches suffered by the residents of Mentia, are presented. The consequences of consumption of salicylates are mentioned. The food companies are using salicylates as preservatives and flavor additives. It is reported that due to rise in use of salicylates, there is a decrease in average number of headaches. At the end, health experts have predicted that in future average number of headaches will further decline.
It is stated that salicylates chemical is helpful to treat headache problems. But the side effects of this chemical on human health is not reported. It would have been possible that although it can cure the headache problem, it can be harmful for other body parts. Food companies are using salicylates as preservatives. What are the other attributes of this salicylates?, are these preservative foods are safe to use or not, for how long we can use it, these type of questionable premises should be answered clearly to strengthen the argument.
The correlation between the rise in the commercial use of salicylates and a steady decline in the average number of headaches is presented by the author. Here statics is not given to justify the facts. The food companies have found the another use of salicylates as flavor additives for foods. Is artificial flavor additives is not harmful for health, what are their features, in which type of food they can be used, such questions should be answered to justify the argument.
The food companies are planning to use salicylates in future as flavor additives. Based on this information health experts have predicted that by the use of these food Mentia will suffer even fewer headaches in the future. How many companies are going to use salicylates as flavor additives and in which type of food, and how many people are going to use that food, these all information should be mentioned to make the prediction reasonable.
As conclusion, the effect of consumption of salicylates on human body, its safe limit which can human body can take, should be stated. More detail survey of food companies and their products which are using salicylates, should be done in order to make argument more stronger. To support the prediction, more justification about the statics of amount and consumption of salicylates should be provided.
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flaws:
No. of Different Words: 152 200
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.05 0.12
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 4.5 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
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No. of Words: 390 350
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No. of Different Words: 152 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.444 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.959 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.844 2.4
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No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 58 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 19.5 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.829 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.05 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.353 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.543 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.083 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5