Claim: Even though young people often receive the advice to “follow your dreams,” more emphasis should be placed on picking worthy goals.
Reason: Many people’s dreams are inherently selfish.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim AND the reason on which that claim is based.
Choice of one's dream is not a trivial one. Every individual has a right to follow his dream, provided the goal is worth the persuasion. The given prompt claims that even though people have the liberty to pursue dreams of their choice, picking worthy goals must be emphasized, submounting selfish one, if exits. In my opinion, I strongly agree with the recommendation and argue that people must be suggested to follow worthy goals for these reasons.
First of all, a person must persue a dream which would invigorate the process of making the society better. It must serve the human mankind in a positive way. A person who works for the society has greter propensity to success. For instance, if a company aims to earn millions by patenting an important drug during a pandemic, they let their selfishness to take precedence. Instead, a firm who makes the scientific findings available to all, serves the whole mankind. This illustartes that having worthy goals is imperative to become a better human being.
Secondly, we must not allow our selfishness to take a toll on our intuition, to make key decisions regarding dreams to follow. We must be able to discer perfectly and make a correct call. Take a child, for instance, who is taught the difference between good and bad from an early age. This shapes the child in good way, and invariably the child chooses right dream to follow. Great leaders like Nelson Mandela, Martin Luther King, Barak Obama, etc. all had one thing in common, following a 'worthy' dream, in interest of the society at large. This illustartes how not letting emotions take over our conscience, leads to success and prosperity.
Finally, we must discourage picking selfish goals which would have serious implications, if not sustained. The latent potential to cause adversities cannot be undermined. For instance, organizations such as ISIS end up following a dream not worthy enough. Once you are engrossed, it is difficult to back out. Terrorism and dictatorship are results of such actions. Hence, we must affirm to pick worthy goals.
Of course, some argue that being selfish is necessary in order to succeed in this increasingly globalized world. I agree that a bit of competency is required to sustain and compete. However, it cannot surpass the worthiness of the goal to follow. If people such as Steve Jobs and Bill Gates would not have persued a worthy goal, we could'nt be able to access this test through computers and internet. Therefore, we must lay a greater emphasis on picking worthy goals rather than following selfish goals.
| Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
|---|---|---|---|
| 2024-11-03 | ekarumeblessing@icloud.com | 83 | view |
| 2023-10-18 | Adesina Boluwatito | 58 | view |
| 2023-10-03 | shamika@25 | 50 | view |
| 2023-10-03 | shamika@25 | 50 | view |
| 2023-09-17 | RIYA MODI | 50 | view |
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Comments
Essay evaluations by e-grader
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 11, Rule ID: ONES[1]
Message: Did you mean 'one's'?
Suggestion: one's
Choice of ones dream is not a trivial one. Every indiv...
^^^^
Line 3, column 141, Rule ID: IN_A_X_MANNER[1]
Message: Consider replacing "in a positive way" with adverb for "positive"; eg, "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
...better. It must serve the human mankind in a positive way. A person who works for the society has...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 6, column 354, Rule ID: AFFORD_VB[1]
Message: This verb is used with the infinitive: 'to right'
Suggestion: to right
...d way, and invariably the child chooses right dream to follow. Great leaders like Nel...
^^^^^
Line 12, column 333, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: couldn't
...ould not have persued a worthy goal, we couldnt be able to access this test through com...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
finally, first, hence, however, if, regarding, second, secondly, so, therefore, for instance, of course, such as, first of all, in my opinion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 16.0 19.5258426966 82% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 12.4196629213 113% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 14.8657303371 61% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 11.3162921348 88% => OK
Pronoun: 31.0 33.0505617978 94% => OK
Preposition: 51.0 58.6224719101 87% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 12.9106741573 62% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2150.0 2235.4752809 96% => OK
No of words: 431.0 442.535393258 97% => OK
Chars per words: 4.98839907193 5.05705443957 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.55637350225 4.55969084622 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.6815986266 2.79657885939 96% => OK
Unique words: 242.0 215.323595506 112% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.561484918794 0.4932671777 114% => OK
syllable_count: 650.7 704.065955056 92% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59117977528 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 15.0 6.24550561798 240% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 5.0 4.99550561798 100% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.10617977528 161% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.77640449438 56% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.38483146067 91% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 28.0 20.2370786517 138% => OK
Sentence length: 15.0 23.0359550562 65% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 33.3662995997 60.3974514979 55% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 76.7857142857 118.986275619 65% => OK
Words per sentence: 15.3928571429 23.4991977007 66% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.03571428571 5.21951772744 96% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.97078651685 101% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 7.80617977528 51% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 17.0 10.2758426966 165% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 9.0 5.13820224719 175% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.83258426966 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.264292279194 0.243740707755 108% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0659621750493 0.0831039109588 79% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0590771058811 0.0758088955206 78% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.156879175316 0.150359130593 104% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0755066735479 0.0667264976115 113% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 9.8 14.1392134831 69% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 64.71 48.8420337079 132% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.92365168539 39% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.0 12.1743820225 66% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.37 12.1639044944 93% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.12 8.38706741573 97% => OK
difficult_words: 102.0 100.480337079 102% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 11.8971910112 67% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.0 11.2143820225 71% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 11.7820224719 68% => The average readability is low. Need to imporve the language.
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 11, Rule ID: ONES[1]
Message: Did you mean 'one's'?
Suggestion: one's
Choice of ones dream is not a trivial one. Every indiv...
^^^^
Line 3, column 141, Rule ID: IN_A_X_MANNER[1]
Message: Consider replacing "in a positive way" with adverb for "positive"; eg, "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
...better. It must serve the human mankind in a positive way. A person who works for the society has...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 6, column 354, Rule ID: AFFORD_VB[1]
Message: This verb is used with the infinitive: 'to right'
Suggestion: to right
...d way, and invariably the child chooses right dream to follow. Great leaders like Nel...
^^^^^
Line 12, column 333, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: couldn't
...ould not have persued a worthy goal, we couldnt be able to access this test through com...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
finally, first, hence, however, if, regarding, second, secondly, so, therefore, for instance, of course, such as, first of all, in my opinion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 16.0 19.5258426966 82% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 12.4196629213 113% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 14.8657303371 61% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 11.3162921348 88% => OK
Pronoun: 31.0 33.0505617978 94% => OK
Preposition: 51.0 58.6224719101 87% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 12.9106741573 62% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2150.0 2235.4752809 96% => OK
No of words: 431.0 442.535393258 97% => OK
Chars per words: 4.98839907193 5.05705443957 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.55637350225 4.55969084622 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.6815986266 2.79657885939 96% => OK
Unique words: 242.0 215.323595506 112% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.561484918794 0.4932671777 114% => OK
syllable_count: 650.7 704.065955056 92% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59117977528 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 15.0 6.24550561798 240% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 5.0 4.99550561798 100% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.10617977528 161% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.77640449438 56% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.38483146067 91% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 28.0 20.2370786517 138% => OK
Sentence length: 15.0 23.0359550562 65% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 33.3662995997 60.3974514979 55% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 76.7857142857 118.986275619 65% => OK
Words per sentence: 15.3928571429 23.4991977007 66% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.03571428571 5.21951772744 96% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.97078651685 101% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 7.80617977528 51% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 17.0 10.2758426966 165% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 9.0 5.13820224719 175% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.83258426966 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.264292279194 0.243740707755 108% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0659621750493 0.0831039109588 79% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0590771058811 0.0758088955206 78% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.156879175316 0.150359130593 104% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0755066735479 0.0667264976115 113% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 9.8 14.1392134831 69% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 64.71 48.8420337079 132% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.92365168539 39% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.0 12.1743820225 66% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.37 12.1639044944 93% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.12 8.38706741573 97% => OK
difficult_words: 102.0 100.480337079 102% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 11.8971910112 67% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.0 11.2143820225 71% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 11.7820224719 68% => The average readability is low. Need to imporve the language.
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.