Many high school students take part time jobs. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this?
Part time jobs recently become very popular among the high school student, it can make them raised more additional money in order to fulfill they need for something. Part time job is a kind of job that could be done with particularry about 5 or 4 hours a day. So its completly enough for al student without abandoning their study.
Due to development of all industries, student recently need so many stuff to help them doing their activity, not only for their studies but also for their entertainment. As we know that not all student have a capabilities to buy their important stuff like a rich kid did. Finally the only solution that they could do only to do is part time jobs . there so many kind jobs available for part time specially in the biggest country such as being a waiters, delivery something, or even cleaning service.
Part time jobs also help student start to learn about the working atmosphere where there are so many adult person as they partner, which is very different from their world. After gaining many experience from the working situation, the high school student also can decide they will start to do work after high school or they want to enter university , and part time jobs will make high school students know their own character.
However despite all the positive think, part time jobs also can destroy their study time. The student with high desire to buty anything even not important thing will take so many jobs and the time for studies become more less and not effecient anymore, so many case aleready happen over the world where part time jobs could make student- for the worse case- failed to finish their high school. In order to prevent that many countries has make the rule to control the student times.
Finally the part time jobs could help the student from poor family able to follow the study without a problem, they also can puchase anyting they needed for covering they entertainment to get rid from the stress.
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Sentence: Part time jobs also help student start to learn about the working atmosphere where there are so many adult person as they partner, which is very different from their world.
Description: The fragment so many adult is not usually preceded by are
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace are with is
Description: A pronoun, personal, nominative, not 3rd person singular is not usually followed by a noun, singular, common
Suggestion: Refer to they and partner
Sentence: However despite all the positive think, part time jobs also can destroy their study time.
Description: An adjective is not usually followed by a verb, base: uninflected present, imperative or infinitive
Suggestion: Refer to positive and think
Sentence: In order to prevent that many countries has make the rule to control the student times.
Description: A verb 'to have', present tense, 3rd person singular is not usually followed by a verb, base: uninflected present, imperative or infinitive
Suggestion: Refer to has and make
Sentence: Finally the part time jobs could help the student from poor family able to follow the study without a problem, they also can puchase anyting they needed for covering they entertainment to get rid from the stress.
Description: A noun, singular, common is not usually followed by an adjective
Suggestion: Refer to family and able
Description: A pronoun, personal, nominative, not 3rd person singular is not usually followed by a noun, singular, common
Suggestion: Refer to they and entertainment
Sentence: Part time job is a kind of job that could be done with particularry about 5 or 4 hours a day.
Error: particularry Suggestion: particularly
Sentence: So its completly enough for al student without abandoning their study.
Error: completly Suggestion: completely
Sentence: The student with high desire to buty anything even not important thing will take so many jobs and the time for studies become more less and not effecient anymore, so many case aleready happen over the world where part time jobs could make student- for the worse case- failed to finish their high school.
Error: buty Suggestion: No alternate word
Error: effecient Suggestion: efficient
Error: aleready Suggestion: already
Sentence: Finally the part time jobs could help the student from poor family able to follow the study without a problem, they also can puchase anyting they needed for covering they entertainment to get rid from the stress.
Error: anyting Suggestion: anything
Error: puchase Suggestion: purchase
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 6 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 7 2
Read a good grammar book.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.5 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 6 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 7 2
No. of Sentences: 12 15
No. of Words: 343 350
No. of Characters: 1582 1500
No. of Different Words: 166 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.304 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.612 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.178 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 88 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 69 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 34 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 23 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 28.583 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 12.386 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.75 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.423 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.663 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.146 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5