The graph below shows the proportion of the population aged 65 and over between 1940 and 2040 in three different countries.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
The line graph illustrates the percentage of elderly people aged 65 and over from 1940 and the estimation of percentage in 2040 in the USA, Japan and Sweden. Overall, it is estimated that the number of senior citizen will significantly increased in 2040 in all three different countries.
To begin, in 1940, Japan has the least number of elderly people with only 5% in comparison with the USA and Sweden, with approximately 9% and 7% respectively. For the following years the percentage of 65 years old and over dipped to just under 5%. However, it is predicted that the proportion of older population will increased sharply at approximately 27% having the highest number of elderly people in 2040 compared to other two countries.
On the other hand, the USA and Sweden followed a similar pattern of changes from 1940 to 1990. However, in Sweden the number of senior citizen increased steadily for the following years and forecast to attain 25% in 2040. Furthermore, the proportion of people aged 65 and over in USA remained leveled from 1990 at under 15% and projected to continue until 2020, also, older people is estimated to rise at approximately 23% in 2040 and have the lowest percentage of senior citizen in three countries.
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2021-12-29 | Tran Gia Bao | 67 | view |
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the number of senior citizen will significantly increased in 2040
the number of senior citizen will significantly increase in 2040
Sentence: However, it is predicted that the proportion of older population will increased sharply at approximately 27 having the highest number of elderly people in 2040 compared to other two countries.
Description: A modal auxillary is not usually followed by a verb, past participle
Suggestion: Refer to will and increased
flaws:
You lost some info. For example:
Sweden stood in 2nd position among three countries in terms of the proportion from 1940 to 1999 but afterwards it came to 1st position.
about in 2030 for Japan, the value is expected to reach 10% in 2030 and afterwards it is expected to rise dramatically to 25% in 2035.
read this:
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.5 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 2 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 8 10
No. of Words: 209 200
No. of Characters: 994 1000
No. of Different Words: 95 100
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 3.802 4.0
Average Word Length: 4.756 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.776 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 70 60
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 50 50
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 35 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 29 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 26.125 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.157 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.5 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.488 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.64 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.055 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 3 4