During a recent plane journey you sat next to a businessman who owns a chain of restaurants You talked to him and he suggested that you should contact him about a possible job in one of his restaurant In letter Remind him when and where you met tell hi

Dear Mr. Kingsley,

I am writing to express my concern of the marketing manager job position of your restaurant in XX city where I am living now. I am Tony Zhang. We were sitting together at the Air China flight Paris to Bejing last Friday.

Maybe you remembered that I was the one introduce my city to you on the plane. After knowing that you will open another restaurant in my hometown which need lots of employees including the marketing manager, I took a deep condsideration of this position. As one of the most famous fast food chain restaurants globally, my hometown will gain more attentions in our country after your new branch opening. I would like to say this is a golden chance for me to work at your restaurant.

Graduated from Marketing management, I have worked in a local western fast food restaurant for 6 years. Not only with the work and study background, but also I am vary familiar with the local restaurant enterprise. Lots of my friends worked in this area in my city, I also could know about the local people's favor on fast food.

It's my honor to meet you as my predcessor in this field. Thank you for your consideration on me in advance. I am promptly waiting for you reply.

Sincerely,
Tony

Votes
Average: 8.1 (1 vote)
Essays by the user:

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 7, column 164, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'varied'.
Suggestion: varied
...ork and study background, but also I am vary familiar with the local restaurant ente...
^^^^
Line 9, column 1, Rule ID: IT_IS[17]
Message: Did you mean 'it's' (='it is') instead of 'its' (possessive pronoun)?
Suggestion: It's; It is
...he local peoples favor on fast food. Its my honor to meet you as my predcessor i...
^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, may, so

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 3.0 7.48453608247 40% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 5.0 4.92783505155 101% => OK
Conjunction : 2.0 5.05154639175 40% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 4.0 3.03092783505 132% => OK
Pronoun: 39.0 32.9175257732 118% => OK
Preposition: 33.0 26.3917525773 125% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 3.85567010309 156% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1013.0 937.175257732 108% => OK
No of words: 220.0 206.0 107% => OK
Chars per words: 4.60454545455 4.54256449028 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 3.85128510684 3.78020617076 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.68243059263 2.54303337028 105% => OK
Unique words: 132.0 127.690721649 103% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.6 0.622605031667 96% => OK
syllable_count: 308.7 290.88556701 106% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.41237113402 99% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 10.0 9.13402061856 109% => OK
Article: 0.0 0.824742268041 0% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 1.83505154639 109% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 0.463917525773 216% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 1.0 1.44329896907 69% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 13.0 12.6804123711 103% => OK
Sentence length: 16.0 16.3608247423 98% => OK
Sentence length SD: 47.5156794744 44.8134815571 106% => OK
Chars per sentence: 77.9230769231 76.5299724578 102% => OK
Words per sentence: 16.9230769231 16.8248392259 101% => OK
Discourse Markers: 1.38461538462 4.34317383033 32% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.29896907216 93% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 2.54639175258 79% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 7.41237113402 94% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 0.0 1.49484536082 0% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 3.94845360825 177% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.168048700754 0.216113520407 78% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0635375515711 0.0766984524023 83% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0661016519799 0.0603063233224 110% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.106177572828 0.12726935374 83% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.061650738603 0.0580467560999 106% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 8.7 8.37731958763 104% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 72.16 70.7449484536 102% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 3.82989690722 81% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 7.2 7.45979381443 97% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.1 8.71597938144 104% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.73 7.59969072165 102% => OK
difficult_words: 46.0 41.2886597938 111% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 7.5 8.62886597938 87% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.4 8.54432989691 98% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 8.15463917526 98% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------
Rates: 81.4606741573 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 7.25 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.