Nowadays people are getting married and having children in their thirties. Does it have a positive or a negative impact on the society? Give your opinion and examples.
It is true that nowadays, younger generations are getting married at later age. Some people hold the opinion that this trend has positive benefits; whereas, others have the conflicting views and they consider this as a negative development. While, in the below essay, I will try to enunciate on this fact with my own perception.
To begin with, people favoring this trend have opinion that there are many positive sides if human beings are tying the knot at older age. Firstly, no doubt people will have sufficient time to settle in their careers. Thus, they can spend all their energies and can devote more time to their professions rather than on their personal married life issues. Secondly, along with work experiences youngsters can earn more money in a life and would be financially strong before getting married. Finally, this is a universally acknowledged fact that as the age of a person progresses he or she is getting more real time experiences of a life; consequently, becomes more mature to handle problems in their life compared to youngsters. On the contrary, others have the conflicting views.
As per them, there are more negative effects if people are getting married in late thirties. First and foremost, health is a serious concern. Certainly, nowadays, due to sedentary life styles people normally suffers from maladies like hypertension, diabetes and high blood pressure in their thirties. Thus, if they will get married late; consequently, kids born to these parents probably may suffer from some kind of ailments. Definitely, this is not good as normally children are considered as a future of a nation. Moreover, if both parents are working on the higher positions devoting time for their younger ones would be difficult because of the job responsibilities. This may result in less bonding and less intimacy between kids and parents. Therefore, government should encourage youngsters to marry at appropriate age.
To recapitulate, by looking at the above facts, getting married at late thirties has its own positive as well as negative sides.
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2015-09-05 | pratik_dkr1 | 67 | view |
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Comments
Dear Sir, Many Thanks for
Dear Sir,
Many Thanks for your valuable comments.
So you mean for this kind of essay question where we need to give our opinion I should follow the pattern suggested by you.
How about my other essays are they of correct pattern or should I need to change the pattern as well for them ?
Regards
RBH
Give your one choice or clear
Give your one choice or clear opinion at the introduction paragraph (for all essay topics, not just for this kind of essays), then in the conclusion, paraphrase the reasons.
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There are nothing wrong for other essays, you can try this pattern for future essays. the reason we suggest this pattern because we find out you didn't make a big improvement. Try a new pattern will give you different approaches on essay writing. If you are not conformable with the pattern, still you can go back to the old one.
and read essays by this user:
http://testbig.com/users/hao
it will give you some ideas on how others are doing essays.
flaws:
1. Better to give a personal and clear opinion for all IELTS essays and put some arguments. Don't simply give a conclusion 'both have positive as well as negative sides'.
2. Don't give simply one sentence for the arguments like:
Secondly, along with work experiences youngsters can earn more money in a life and would be financially strong before getting married.
need to extend the ideas. such as:
why 'they can earn more money in life and would be financially strong before getting married.' (maybe they earn more if they get married earlier)
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The writing style you are using is not suggested. try this pattern:
paragraph 1: introduction. Your ideas/opinions here.
paragraph 2: Admittedly, there are some advantages of side A. First, ... Second, ...
paragraph 3: However, still I support side B. reason 1 + why reason 1 + example for reason 1 + a small conclusion for reason 1.
paragraph 4: reason 2 + why reason 2 + example for reason 2+ a small conclusion for reason 2.
paragraph 5: conclusion.
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and read essays by this user:
http://testbig.com/users/hao
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Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.5 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 18 15
No. of Words: 337 350
No. of Characters: 1684 1500
No. of Different Words: 187 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.285 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.997 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.669 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 121 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 96 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 64 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 32 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 18.722 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.57 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.889 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.292 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.466 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.062 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5