Some people believe that when busy parents do not have a lot of time to spend with their children, the best use of that time is to have fun playing games or sports. Others believe that it is best to use that time doing things together that are related to schoolwork. Which of the two approaches do you prefer? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
As time passes and people become more developed, they become more aware of the child's proper upbringing since they are the cornerstones of a successful society and parents their guardians play a pivotal role in their flourishing. Meanwhile, the huge workload that parents encounter with remained less spare time for them to spend with their sweeteners. In this circumstance, A plethora of people, are of the conviction that it is better parents spend this time for some leisure activity instead of teaching the child their school works. Others, on the other hand, hold a radically different point of view and assert the working school's assignment with the child is the more beneficial choice and to improve their learning efficiency which in turn contributed to the best grade in school. By considering the merits and demerits of two aforementioned viewpoints, I am of the opinion that the advantages of the former idea outweigh the prose of the second one. In the following paragraphs, I will elaborate more details for having this standpoint.
The first and most exquisite point which come to the mind to substantiate my standpoint is that doing some hobbies with children increased both parents and child's spirit and provided them for office and school, respectively. In fact, the amount of parents spare time is not so much. Besides, during the day they faced manifold amount of working stress which left them tiredness and depleted their energy. In this circumstance, they could not concentrate on the material that they want to work with their children. So, it is better for them spending this time on leisure activities and hire a tutor to work with their children.
The other equally important reason, if not more, is that spending some time with children increased the communication between parents and their child in which parent become aware child's problems that are indispensable for child's better conduction. Actually, it is important for parents to know child's penchants and passions to direct them properly. Admittedly, parents can gain this information when they walk or speak with the child in the park or playing with them no when their concentrate on the lesson. A survey that recently published by Tehran university scholars, demonstrated that about 80 percent of parents and child that spend more time on leisure activity are more successful in their work and school, respectively.
To make a long story short, by considering all the aforementioned reasons into consideration and many others that do not express here for the shortage of time, I, strongly support this idea that parent should spend their spare time with their child in the park, sports activity, and other hobbies. I hope improving the living condition all over the world provide enough time for parents to notice more aspects of their child's life.
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2020-01-23 | nusybah | 73 | view |
2020-01-22 | farzaddanaei | 73 | view |
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2020-01-14 | 3dra | 63 | view |
2020-01-12 | mucahit11 | 60 | view |
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 629, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'schools'' or 'school's'?
Suggestion: schools'; school's
...nt point of view and assert the working schools assignment with the child is the more b...
^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 427, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...eted their energy. In this circumstance, they could not concentrate on the materi...
^^
Line 3, column 468, Rule ID: NOW[2]
Message: Did you mean 'now' (=at this moment) instead of 'no' (negation)?
Suggestion: now
... child in the park or playing with them no when their concentrate on the lesson. A...
^^
Line 3, column 572, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...published by Tehran university scholars, demonstrated that about 80 percent of pa...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, besides, but, first, if, second, so, while, in fact, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 11.0 15.1003584229 73% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 4.0 9.8082437276 41% => OK
Conjunction : 19.0 13.8261648746 137% => OK
Relative clauses : 18.0 11.0286738351 163% => OK
Pronoun: 52.0 43.0788530466 121% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 63.0 52.1666666667 121% => OK
Nominalization: 9.0 8.0752688172 111% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2376.0 1977.66487455 120% => OK
No of words: 465.0 407.700716846 114% => OK
Chars per words: 5.10967741935 4.8611393121 105% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.64369019777 4.48103885553 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.72977357599 2.67179642975 102% => OK
Unique words: 224.0 212.727598566 105% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.481720430108 0.524837075471 92% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 710.1 618.680645161 115% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 9.59856630824 73% => OK
Article: 6.0 3.08781362007 194% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.51792114695 57% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 9.0 4.94265232975 182% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 20.6003584229 83% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 27.0 20.1344086022 134% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 66.5755028359 48.9658058833 136% => OK
Chars per sentence: 139.764705882 100.406767564 139% => OK
Words per sentence: 27.3529411765 20.6045352989 133% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.70588235294 5.45110844103 86% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.5376344086 72% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 11.8709677419 118% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.88709677419 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.26565908321 0.236089414692 113% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.100547019825 0.076458572812 132% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0561870346956 0.0737576698707 76% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.188970981909 0.150856017488 125% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0169504560041 0.0645574589148 26% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 16.3 11.7677419355 139% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 52.53 58.1214874552 90% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.6 10.1575268817 124% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.65 10.9000537634 116% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.34 8.01818996416 104% => OK
difficult_words: 99.0 86.8835125448 114% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 13.5 10.002688172 135% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.8 10.0537634409 127% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 10.247311828 127% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.