TPO-20 - Independent Writing Task Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?Successful people try new things and take risks rather than only doing what they know how to do well.Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
There is no doubt that today’s world complexity causes people to do novel things and venture. Taking risk is of paramount importance on people' life. This brings us an arguable question: Have taking risks and executing new tasks connection with success? As far as I'm concerned, I declare that success has a correlation with venturing and performing new activities and successful individuals take risks as well as try new things. In the following paragraphs, I will discuss my reasons well.
To begin with, successful people put their assets in danger by invest on business and valuable things. Successful people sell their own valuable assets and staffs in order to invest on business. Not only that, but also these people like to spend the whole of their monthly salary to buy stocks. Moreover, successful individuals put aside money on purchasing old cars and motorcycles so that they can sell them in the future for a large amount of money. Individuals who are prosperous buy properties such as apartments and a piece of land, because they predict that these assets will get expensive in the future. For example, I know someone who is now wealthy. This person when was young, took risks and expended a great deals of money for buying archaic buildings. He currently in his old age is an affluent person and sell whatever he purchased in this adulthood for a lot of money. Therefore, successful and wealthy people always take risks in their lifespan and spend time on buying business and staffs.
The second reason is that subjects succeed because they try to do new things and extend their knowledge. In fact, a person who have knowledge from different topics will become success. When a worker tries to learn how to operate a machinery in the company, he promoted his rank in that firm. If this person gains knowledge related to management or receives a university degree in field of management such as mechanical engineering management, he will be able to rank his position to higher job position in his company. For instance, at first one of my friend was a simple employee at a car manufacturing, however, when he acquired a master degree in a college, he was assigned the responsibility of production managing in the firm. So, as you can see, performing new things and expanding knowledge regarding a specific field will help people to promote their job position and thus become successful in their career.
In conclusion, according the above-mentioned reasons, I think that it is a true fact that prosperous subjects try new things and take risks. The reasons behind this standpoint are that they devote money for buying new things and they try to do new experience. How people will succeed in their profession, if they only have ordinary knowledge!
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 269, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: I'm
...asks connection with success? As far as Im concerned, I declare that success has a...
^^
Line 1, column 495, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...graphs, I will discuss my reasons well. To begin with, successful people put the...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, however, if, moreover, regarding, second, so, therefore, thus, well, for example, for instance, i think, in conclusion, in fact, no doubt, such as, as well as, to begin with
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 12.0 15.1003584229 79% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 9.8082437276 82% => OK
Conjunction : 20.0 13.8261648746 145% => OK
Relative clauses : 16.0 11.0286738351 145% => OK
Pronoun: 51.0 43.0788530466 118% => OK
Preposition: 56.0 52.1666666667 107% => OK
Nominalization: 13.0 8.0752688172 161% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2302.0 1977.66487455 116% => OK
No of words: 466.0 407.700716846 114% => OK
Chars per words: 4.93991416309 4.8611393121 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.64618479453 4.48103885553 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.78068864943 2.67179642975 104% => OK
Unique words: 237.0 212.727598566 111% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.508583690987 0.524837075471 97% => OK
syllable_count: 701.1 618.680645161 113% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 10.0 9.59856630824 104% => OK
Article: 3.0 3.08781362007 97% => OK
Subordination: 7.0 3.51792114695 199% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 23.0 20.6003584229 112% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 20.1344086022 99% => OK
Sentence length SD: 46.2901999207 48.9658058833 95% => OK
Chars per sentence: 100.086956522 100.406767564 100% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.2608695652 20.6045352989 98% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.30434782609 5.45110844103 152% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 21.0 11.8709677419 177% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.88709677419 20% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.259086960138 0.236089414692 110% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0811839531299 0.076458572812 106% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0661758354004 0.0737576698707 90% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.188781806756 0.150856017488 125% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0923584622123 0.0645574589148 143% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.0 11.7677419355 102% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 59.64 58.1214874552 103% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 10.1575268817 97% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.37 10.9000537634 104% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.02 8.01818996416 100% => OK
difficult_words: 100.0 86.8835125448 115% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 7.0 10.002688172 70% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 10.0537634409 99% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 10.247311828 98% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.