TPO 40: Some parents offer their school-age children money for each high grade (mark) they get in school. Do you think this is a good idea? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

There is no doubt that appealing children to study their courses and pay more attention to school activities has long been a concern for parents. In this context, various approaches have been experimented which one of them is rewarding children by paying money for their good performances. Although some might deem it is an effective method, I believe this approach has certain demerits that overshadow its advantages. In what follows, I delve into the reasons substantiating my standpoint.

To begin with, the concept of getting paid to study might be misinterpreted by Children. That is to say, when they look into financial transactions of society they find out that money is exchanged between two people only if either a service is provided to or a good is purchased by one side. So this misleading clue makes them believe that their distinct performance in school is a service that they are providing for their parents. They are incapable of seeing the bigger picture that good grades benefit them when they are grown up and searching for a suitable career. As a result, when they begin to earn money, for instance by having a part-time job, they do not see it necessary to provide the service mentioned before for their parents, thus paying much less attention to school.

Moreover, Pupils are not mature enough in financial affairs to wisely spend the money they get from their parents and they might waste it by purchasing useless objects or eating junk foods which can hinder the healthy development of their minds and bodies. The more pessimistic scenario is that children might lure into giving their cash to criminals that illegally sell drugs to students. Also, it is possible that older students bully them to give their money by force.
Finally, as the financial status of all families are not the same, some students might envy those whose parents can afford giving them cash. This feeling induces a sense of humiliation and depression in impoverished students and they reproach their parents for not being like wealthy ones. Numerous quarrels between children and parents could arise due to the contempt such children would develop against their families.

To Sum up, I believe that rewarding children with money for good grades is not a bright idea. this is because it causes children to misinterpret their parents action and become conditional in their education. Also, they could use the money in the wrong ways as they are financially immature yet. Finally, as not all families could afford paying money to their kids, it brings disputes between parents and children in poor families.

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Average: 8.3 (1 vote)
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 6, column 124, Rule ID: AFFORD_VBG[1]
Message: This verb is used with infinitive: 'to give'.
Suggestion: to give
...ght envy those whose parents can afford giving them cash. This feeling induces a sense...
^^^^^^
Line 8, column 95, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: This
...y for good grades is not a bright idea. this is because it causes children to misint...
^^^^
Line 8, column 339, Rule ID: AFFORD_VBG[1]
Message: This verb is used with infinitive: 'to pay'.
Suggestion: to pay
...nally, as not all families could afford paying money to their kids, it brings disputes...
^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, finally, if, look, moreover, so, thus, for instance, no doubt, as a result, to begin with, to sum up, that is to say

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 22.0 15.1003584229 146% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 9.8082437276 112% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 13.8261648746 87% => OK
Relative clauses : 17.0 11.0286738351 154% => OK
Pronoun: 59.0 43.0788530466 137% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 53.0 52.1666666667 102% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 8.0752688172 87% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2184.0 1977.66487455 110% => OK
No of words: 434.0 407.700716846 106% => OK
Chars per words: 5.03225806452 4.8611393121 104% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.56428161445 4.48103885553 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.59118978037 2.67179642975 97% => OK
Unique words: 228.0 212.727598566 107% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.52534562212 0.524837075471 100% => OK
syllable_count: 652.5 618.680645161 105% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 9.59856630824 115% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 3.51792114695 171% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.94265232975 81% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 20.6003584229 92% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 20.1344086022 109% => OK
Sentence length SD: 45.6825127019 48.9658058833 93% => OK
Chars per sentence: 114.947368421 100.406767564 114% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.8421052632 20.6045352989 111% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.42105263158 5.45110844103 118% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.5376344086 54% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 6.0 11.8709677419 51% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 10.0 3.85842293907 259% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.31451851479 0.236089414692 133% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.102304889824 0.076458572812 134% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0447672710302 0.0737576698707 61% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.182719285139 0.150856017488 121% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0460158343599 0.0645574589148 71% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.7 11.7677419355 116% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 57.61 58.1214874552 99% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 10.1575268817 105% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.19 10.9000537634 112% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.33 8.01818996416 104% => OK
difficult_words: 99.0 86.8835125448 114% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 10.002688172 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 10.0537634409 107% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 83.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 25.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.