TPO 47
Some people are inclined toward the idea that it is required for people to know about events from worldwide despite they will not affect our daily life. Other, on the other hand, are against this idea. As far as I am concerned, my own opinion is that it is unnecessary for people to know the events which are not impact our life. In the following essay, I will delve into several reasons and examples to illustrate my opinion.
First of all, people today have less free time to relax because of the heavy workloads. Getting the information around the world in very detailed takes a lot of time, making people are reluctant to do it. Take my friend, David, as an example. When he worked in a computer company, he had to communicate with foreigner. As a result, he had to absorbing different news in order to chat with the customers. He sacrificed most of his extra time on knowing the events from worldwide and remembering them in his notebook. However, this activity made him have lots of stress and he had bad performance on his work. Therefore, I suggested him take his free time to exercising or having a good sleep to release the pressure and stop researching and knowing this useless information. After doing that, he improved his performance on his job, had extra free time to company with his families, most importantly was that he lowered many pressure on facing the customers. Apparently, it is not quite crucial for people to know events from the world since my friend is the compelling example to explain it.
Secondly, there are many criminal events, violent news and fleshly scenes around the world. Knowing these events impact our emotion and leading us to have bad mood. Take my own experience as an example. When I was a university student, I watched the television on one day. The screen presented a horrible news that the children from other country were killed in a war. I felt sad and uncomfortable because these children were witness and too little. Subsequently, I turned to different channels and adjusted my emotion. Therefore, I decided not to get and watch the news around the world since it impact my feeling and put me in the bad emotion. My own experience is a obvious example to demonstrate that knowing events from worldwide may cause us to have horrible emotion when we see terrified events.
In conclusion, from what has been mentioned above, knowing events, which are unlikely to affect our routine life, is not extremely crucial. Since that knowing these events not only waste our leisure time, but also impact our personal emotion.
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 295, Rule ID: A_UNCOUNTABLE[3]
Message: Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply 'horrible news'.
Suggestion: horrible news
...vision on one day. The screen presented a horrible news that the children from other country we...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 668, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...n the bad emotion. My own experience is a obvious example to demonstrate that kno...
^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, apparently, but, first, however, if, may, second, secondly, so, therefore, in conclusion, as a result, first of all, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 18.0 15.1003584229 119% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 3.0 9.8082437276 31% => OK
Conjunction : 14.0 13.8261648746 101% => OK
Relative clauses : 12.0 11.0286738351 109% => OK
Pronoun: 63.0 43.0788530466 146% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 60.0 52.1666666667 115% => OK
Nominalization: 11.0 8.0752688172 136% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2131.0 1977.66487455 108% => OK
No of words: 446.0 407.700716846 109% => OK
Chars per words: 4.77802690583 4.8611393121 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.5955099915 4.48103885553 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.5967271741 2.67179642975 97% => OK
Unique words: 222.0 212.727598566 104% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.497757847534 0.524837075471 95% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 686.7 618.680645161 111% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 14.0 9.59856630824 146% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 7.0 3.51792114695 199% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.94265232975 121% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 25.0 20.6003584229 121% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 20.1344086022 84% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 38.071511659 48.9658058833 78% => OK
Chars per sentence: 85.24 100.406767564 85% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.84 20.6045352989 87% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.6 5.45110844103 103% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 6.0 11.8709677419 51% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 9.0 3.85842293907 233% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 10.0 4.88709677419 205% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0 0.236089414692 0% => The similarity between the topic and the content is low.
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0 0.076458572812 0% => Sentence topic similarity is low.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0 0.0737576698707 0% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0 0.150856017488 0% => Maybe some paragraphs are off the topic.
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0 0.0645574589148 0% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.0 11.7677419355 85% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 62.68 58.1214874552 108% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.7 10.1575268817 86% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.15 10.9000537634 93% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.91 8.01818996416 99% => OK
difficult_words: 97.0 86.8835125448 112% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 7.5 10.002688172 75% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.8 10.0537634409 88% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
It is not exactly right on the topic in the view of e-grader. Maybe there is a wrong essay topic.
Rates: 3.33333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 1.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.