TPO44Some people believe that when busy parents do not have a lot of time to spend with their children, the best use of that time is to have fun playing games or sports. Other believe that it is best to use that time doing things together that are related

Essay topics:

TPO44
Some people believe that when busy parents do not have a lot of time to spend with their children, the best use of that time is to have fun playing games or sports. Other believe that it is best to use that time doing things together that are related to schoolwork, which of the two approaches do you prefer?

In the present time, most of parents have many occupations; therefore, they have a short time to spend with their children. This issue that what is the best use of that time has engendered copious controversy among people. Although a certain conclusion cannot be made, I, to a great extent, hold this viewpoint that it is more beneficial for both parents and children to have fun in that spare time. Among countless reasons, which can vindicate my point of view, I will mention the two most conspicuous ones through the following paragraphs.
The first reason that juts out of my mind easily at the first moment of thinking about this issue is the fact that by doing so, their level of stress will reduce. Genuinely, having fun together will help them to decrease their anxiety, which is imposed on them by the stressful hours at their jobs or schools. Furthermore, by playing some sports in that time, they will become in fit, which is one of the most important factors in people’s health. Therefore, this kind of families will become mentally and physically healthier than the others. To make a tangible example, a research that has conducted by some scientists in my country has shown that almost 80 percent of families who do exercise at least three hours a week, have a suitable lifestyle and all of their members are in profitable shapes. As it is clear, the more families have fun, the healthier they will become.
The second and equally exquisite proof for this assertion is about this importance that children who play with their families, will be able to attend the society more impressively. In other words, they will become more sociable and will learn how to compete with other individuals effectively, which is very important in their future. These results are thanks to the fact that by plying, children learn these matters unconsciously. To shed more light on this issue, consider a child who is very shy(embarrassed) and he cannot defend his opinion in public. Definitely, by spending some time with his family and playing with them, he would learn how to express his ideas and his social abilities will be improved. Therefore, he will face with less difficulties in the future. Hence, it is highly recommended that parents have fun with their children in their free time.
To make a long story short, based on the aforementioned arguments, we may draw the conclusion that it can be more advantages for both parents and their children to play with each other. This contention is due to this importance that not only is it useful for their health and will lead to a perfect lifestyle but also it is helpful in children’s future. Consequently, the more time parents spend playing with their children, the more benefit that their children will achieve in the not- so-distant future.

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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 22, Rule ID: MOST_SOME_OF_NNS[1]
Message: After 'most of', you should use 'the' ('most of the parents') or simply say ''most parents''.
Suggestion: most of the parents; most parents
In the present time, most of parents have many occupations; therefore, they ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 577, Rule ID: A_UNCOUNTABLE[1]
Message: Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply 'research'.
Suggestion: research
...the others. To make a tangible example, a research that has conducted by some scientists i...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 739, Rule ID: FEWER_LESS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'fewer'? The noun difficulties is countable.
Suggestion: fewer
... improved. Therefore, he will face with less difficulties in the future. Hence, it i...
^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, consequently, first, furthermore, hence, if, may, second, so, therefore, at least, in conclusion, kind of, in other words, to a great extent

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 19.0 15.1003584229 126% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 19.0 9.8082437276 194% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 13.8261648746 87% => OK
Relative clauses : 22.0 11.0286738351 199% => OK
Pronoun: 64.0 43.0788530466 149% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 65.0 52.1666666667 125% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 8.0752688172 62% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2332.0 1977.66487455 118% => OK
No of words: 478.0 407.700716846 117% => OK
Chars per words: 4.87866108787 4.8611393121 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.67581127817 4.48103885553 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.66500921572 2.67179642975 100% => OK
Unique words: 234.0 212.727598566 110% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.489539748954 0.524837075471 93% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 700.2 618.680645161 113% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 13.0 9.59856630824 135% => OK
Article: 7.0 3.08781362007 227% => Less articles wanted as sentence beginning.
Subordination: 2.0 3.51792114695 57% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 9.0 4.94265232975 182% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 20.6003584229 97% => OK
Sentence length: 23.0 20.1344086022 114% => OK
Sentence length SD: 44.5577153813 48.9658058833 91% => OK
Chars per sentence: 116.6 100.406767564 116% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.9 20.6045352989 116% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.55 5.45110844103 139% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.5376344086 54% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 15.0 11.8709677419 126% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.85842293907 52% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.291840542708 0.236089414692 124% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.101780061144 0.076458572812 133% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0909419066832 0.0737576698707 123% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.20165516819 0.150856017488 134% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0609502729734 0.0645574589148 94% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.5 11.7677419355 115% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 56.59 58.1214874552 97% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 10.1575268817 109% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.32 10.9000537634 104% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.85 8.01818996416 98% => OK
difficult_words: 93.0 86.8835125448 107% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 10.0537634409 111% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.