TOEFL integrated writing The sea otter

The article mentions possible explanations for rapid decline in Sea otters and points out that most of the factors indicate the environmental pollution as a main cause behind this. However, the lecturer explains and provides contradictory points to suggest that the possible reason of cause is predation.

First of all, the passage states that the oil rigs near the Alaskan coast cause the pollution that cause the decrease in the otters' immune systems and indirectly result in their death. Though, the professor points out that the pollution hypothesis is weaken by the fact that if otters' death can infect other spices too but there is no evidence to prove that point. Also, otters' dead bodies are not found in sea ares ,therefore, the predation theory is more consistance with this fact.

Secondly, the author of the passage mentions that the decline of other small mammals indicates the result of environmental pollution because it affects an entire ecosystem. Although, the professor provides contrary explanation for this. The whales have been disappered because of human hunting. As a result, the otters stared preying on other small mammals such as seals, sea lions, etc. for survival. Thus, the decline in small mammals can be explain better by predation theory.

Thirdly, the articles provides an hypothesis about uneven pattern of otter decline to explain that pollution greatly affected population of otters in some location. However, the lecturer opposes this explanation. He believes that uneven decline in population of otters better explained by predation. Otters lives depends upon their access to their preys. uneven pattern created because of otters cannot access in shallow and rocky water.

In sum, the author of the passage explains reasons to support his arguments about environmental pollution but, the professor provides counterarguments to each points and provides explanation for predation hypothesis.

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Average: 8 (1 vote)
Essay Categories
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 283, Rule ID: OF_CAUSE[1]
Message: Did you mean 'of course' (=naturally)?
Suggestion: of course
...nts to suggest that the possible reason of cause is predation. First of all, the pass...
^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 252, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'weakened'.
Suggestion: weakened
...ts out that the pollution hypothesis is weaken by the fact that if otters death can in...
^^^^^^
Line 3, column 416, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...rs dead bodies are not found in sea ares ,therefore, the predation theory is more ...
^^
Line 7, column 32, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'a' instead of 'an' if the following word doesn't start with a vowel sound, e.g. 'a sentence', 'a university'
Suggestion: a
...eory. Thirdly, the articles provides an hypothesis about uneven pattern of otte...
^^
Line 7, column 356, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Uneven
...pends upon their access to their preys. uneven pattern created because of otters canno...
^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, however, if, second, secondly, so, therefore, third, thirdly, thus, such as, as a result, first of all

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 7.0 10.4613686534 67% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 3.0 5.04856512141 59% => OK
Conjunction : 7.0 7.30242825607 96% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 12.0772626932 83% => OK
Pronoun: 20.0 22.412803532 89% => OK
Preposition: 39.0 30.3222958057 129% => OK
Nominalization: 19.0 5.01324503311 379% => Less nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1640.0 1373.03311258 119% => OK
No of words: 301.0 270.72406181 111% => OK
Chars per words: 5.44850498339 5.08290768461 107% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.16525528304 4.04702891845 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.70593876733 2.5805825403 105% => OK
Unique words: 156.0 145.348785872 107% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.518272425249 0.540411800872 96% => OK
syllable_count: 502.2 419.366225166 120% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.55342163355 109% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 1.0 3.25607064018 31% => OK
Article: 14.0 8.23620309051 170% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 1.25165562914 80% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.51434878587 0% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 2.5761589404 39% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 16.0 13.0662251656 122% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 21.2450331126 85% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 58.2100955584 49.2860985944 118% => OK
Chars per sentence: 102.5 110.228320801 93% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.8125 21.698381199 87% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.5 7.06452816374 106% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.09492273731 122% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 4.19205298013 119% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 3.0 4.33554083885 69% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 4.45695364238 112% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 9.0 4.27373068433 211% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.144890030981 0.272083759551 53% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0503622607703 0.0996497079465 51% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0533810848874 0.0662205650399 81% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0809238436703 0.162205337803 50% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0494214727448 0.0443174109184 112% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.6 13.3589403974 102% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 44.75 53.8541721854 83% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 5.55761589404 158% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 11.0289183223 104% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.33 12.2367328918 117% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.57 8.42419426049 102% => OK
difficult_words: 77.0 63.6247240618 121% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 10.7273730684 131% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 10.498013245 88% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 11.2008830022 125% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 80.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 24.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.