TPO 30
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0in;margin-bottom:.0001pt;line-height:
normal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Arial",sans-serif;
mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-bidi-language:FA">Both the reading passage and the lecture discuss about the usage of ingenious weapon
named "burning mirror", which used by Roman navy in attacktion the
Greek port city. With this in mind, the reading states that there are several
points that show the burning mirror is just a myth. The lecturer, on the other
hand refutes all the three episodes of arguments mentioned in the passage,
believing that all those reasons are impractical and unconvincing.</span><span style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman",serif;mso-fareast-font-family:
"Times New Roman";mso-bidi-language:FA"></span></p><span style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Arial",sans-serif;
mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-bidi-language:FA"></span><span style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Arial",sans-serif;
mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-bidi-language:FA">First, the author explains that making such a advanced weapon need some precise geometric
</span><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0in;margin-bottom:.0001pt;line-height:
normal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Arial",sans-serif;
mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-bidi-language:FA">shape, sufficient intensity of sunlight and thechnology for making large copper
sheet. But the ancient Greeks were not access to advance technology at that
time. Conversely, the professor makes it clear that mathematic calculations
show that some pecies of copper and mirror could be used to form a large and
wide reflection device.</span><span style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman",serif;
mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-bidi-language:FA"></span></p><span style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Arial",sans-serif;
mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-bidi-language:FA">Second, the reading selection argues that an experiment showed that in order to fier </span><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0in;margin-bottom:.0001pt;line-height:
normal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Arial",sans-serif;
mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-bidi-language:FA">ship, burning mirror will take a longe time for an unmoving object. Since it is
impossible that roman ships stayed for long time, burning mirror would have
been impractical. Howevere, the speaker points a view that in the mentioned
experiment the object was woden. He continues that, Roman's ships were not made
by wood, they also used a kind of water profe material which could fired on
seconds even if the ships were moving.</span><span style="font-size:12.0pt;
font-family:"Times New Roman",serif;mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";
mso-bidi-language:FA"></span></p><span style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Arial",sans-serif;
mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-bidi-language:FA"></span><span style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Arial",sans-serif;
mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-bidi-language:FA">Finally, the text writer explains that Greeks already used flaming arrows which would have</span><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0in;margin-bottom:.0001pt;line-height:
normal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Arial",sans-serif;
mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-bidi-language:FA">been effective at about the same distance so, the burning mirror is does not
seem to be an advanced weapon. The professor again contradict this claim and
illustrates that since the Roman solder were familiar with flaming arrow, they
would not be surprised by flaming arrows. So, Greeks may have used burning
mirror to surprise Romans and win in the attack.</span><span style="font-size:
12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman",serif;mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";
mso-bidi-language:FA"></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"> </p>
- TPO 30 80
- TPO 24-INTEGRATED WRITING ESSAY 73
- do you agree or disagree?educating children is a more difficult task today than it was in the past because they spend so much time on cell phone, online games, and social networking web sites. 73
- TPO.31 80
- model essayshut down The Salton Sea in California is facing a problem that the salinity has been increasing for the rapid evaporation rate. The reading passage has given three solutions while the listening part reveals the leak of them one by one. T 75
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 78, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , sans-serif
...ize:12.0pt;font-family:"Arial",sans-serif; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times N...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 8, column 148, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , serif
...;font-family:"Times New Roman",serif;mso-fareast-font-family: "Times N...
^^^^^^
Line 9, column 131, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , sans-serif
...ize:12.0pt;font-family:"Arial",sans-serif; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times N...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 10, column 151, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , sans-serif
...ize:12.0pt;font-family:"Arial",sans-serif; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times N...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 11, column 124, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...t, the author explains that making such a advanced weapon need some precise geome...
^
Line 13, column 78, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , sans-serif
...ize:12.0pt;font-family:"Arial",sans-serif; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times N...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 15, column 40, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'accessed'.
Suggestion: accessed
... sheet. But the ancient Greeks were not access to advance technology at that time. Co...
^^^^^^
Line 18, column 105, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , serif
...;font-family:"Times New Roman",serif; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times N...
^^^^^^
Line 19, column 155, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , sans-serif
...ize:12.0pt;font-family:"Arial",sans-serif; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times N...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 21, column 78, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , sans-serif
...ize:12.0pt;font-family:"Arial",sans-serif; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times N...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 28, column 40, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , serif
... font-family:"Times New Roman",serif;mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New...
^^^^^^
Line 29, column 103, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , sans-serif
...ize:12.0pt;font-family:"Arial",sans-serif; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times N...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 30, column 151, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , sans-serif
...ize:12.0pt;font-family:"Arial",sans-serif; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times N...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 32, column 78, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , sans-serif
...ize:12.0pt;font-family:"Arial",sans-serif; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times N...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 38, column 47, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , serif
...;font-family:"Times New Roman",serif;mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New...
^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, conversely, finally, first, however, if, may, second, so, kind of
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 15.0 10.4613686534 143% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 5.04856512141 158% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 7.30242825607 110% => OK
Relative clauses : 17.0 12.0772626932 141% => OK
Pronoun: 22.0 22.412803532 98% => OK
Preposition: 29.0 30.3222958057 96% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 5.01324503311 140% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 4177.0 1373.03311258 304% => Less number of characters wanted.
No of words: 377.0 270.72406181 139% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 11.0795755968 5.08290768461 218% => Less chars per word wanted.
Fourth root words length: 4.4064143971 4.04702891845 109% => OK
Word Length SD: 15.4440350739 2.5805825403 598% => Word_Length_SD is high.
Unique words: 200.0 145.348785872 138% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.53050397878 0.540411800872 98% => OK
syllable_count: 1064.7 419.366225166 254% => syllable counts are too long.
avg_syllables_per_word: 2.8 1.55342163355 180% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 3.25607064018 92% => OK
Article: 9.0 8.23620309051 109% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 1.25165562914 80% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.51434878587 66% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 2.5761589404 155% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 10.0 13.0662251656 77% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 37.0 21.2450331126 174% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 419.554346897 49.2860985944 851% => The lengths of sentences changed so frequently.
Chars per sentence: 417.7 110.228320801 379% => Less chars_per_sentence wanted.
Words per sentence: 37.7 21.698381199 174% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.6 7.06452816374 108% => OK
Paragraphs: 40.0 4.09492273731 977% => Less paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 15.0 4.19205298013 358% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 2.0 4.33554083885 46% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 4.45695364238 67% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.27373068433 117% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0996454907236 0.272083759551 37% => The similarity between the topic and the content is low.
Sentence topic coherence: 0.122217094763 0.0996497079465 123% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0940474118972 0.0662205650399 142% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0637258242934 0.162205337803 39% => Maybe some paragraphs are off the topic.
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0837817939544 0.0443174109184 189% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 49.6 13.3589403974 371% => Automated_readability_index is high.
flesch_reading_ease: -67.6 53.8541721854 -126% => Flesch_reading_ease is low.
smog_index: 18.2 5.55761589404 327% => Smog_index is high.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 31.9 11.0289183223 289% => Flesch kincaid grade is high.
coleman_liau_index: 47.58 12.2367328918 389% => Coleman_liau_index is high.
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.7 8.42419426049 115% => OK
difficult_words: 101.0 63.6247240618 159% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 23.5 10.7273730684 219% => Linsear_write_formula is high.
gunning_fog: 16.8 10.498013245 160% => OK
text_standard: 24.0 11.2008830022 214% => The average readability is very high. Good job!
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Write the essay in 20 minutes.
Maximum four paragraphs wanted.
Rates: 80.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 24.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.