TPO-42 - Integrated Writing Task

The reading and lecture both discuss the idea of protecting the birds from getting hurt from regular glass of building materials. While reading provides three solutions to protect the birds from the glass, the professor refutes, saying none of these claims are convincing.

Firstly, the reading states that we can use one way glass instead of the regular one. So, the birds can see the reflected pictures and will not fly through it. However, the professor argues this notion by saying that replacing the regular glass by one way transparent one will not solve the problem. This is because this glass will act as a mirror. Moreover, the out surface is bad as the regular glass. Furthermore, the birds can not understand the reflected pictures of sky or trees. As a result, the birds will fly right in it.

In addition, the article avers that we can make colorful strips on the transparent glass. So, people inside can see well and in the same time the birds will recognize that it is a sold body. On the other hand, the professor contradicts this idea by pointing out that the strips on regular glass are still a problem. In fact, people inside would see from the opening part, but the birds would see the opening part as a hole and they would fly through it. So, the unpainted areas should be extra small to protect the birds. Consequently, it will be too dark and it will be hard for people inside to see.

Lastly, the article mentions that we can use electromagnetic field through the building. So, the birds can feel it and fly away from the building. As a result, we can save all birds from getting injured. Nevertheless, the professor argues this point by explaining that this is true that birds can feel the electromagnetic field. Furthermore, birds can use the electromagnetic field when they migrate long distance from cold area to the warm area. On the other hand, they depend on their eyes when they travel short distance. So, electromagnetic field would not have much effect.

Votes
Average: 6.8 (1 vote)
Essay Categories
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Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, consequently, first, firstly, furthermore, however, lastly, moreover, nevertheless, so, still, well, while, in addition, in fact, as a result, on the other hand

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 9.0 10.4613686534 86% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 22.0 5.04856512141 436% => Less auxiliary verb wanted.
Conjunction : 8.0 7.30242825607 110% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 12.0772626932 83% => OK
Pronoun: 31.0 22.412803532 138% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 37.0 30.3222958057 122% => OK
Nominalization: 3.0 5.01324503311 60% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1649.0 1373.03311258 120% => OK
No of words: 348.0 270.72406181 129% => OK
Chars per words: 4.73850574713 5.08290768461 93% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.31911543099 4.04702891845 107% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.55430353995 2.5805825403 99% => OK
Unique words: 153.0 145.348785872 105% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.439655172414 0.540411800872 81% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 478.8 419.366225166 114% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.55342163355 90% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 3.25607064018 123% => OK
Article: 14.0 8.23620309051 170% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 1.25165562914 240% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 1.0 1.51434878587 66% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 2.5761589404 155% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 13.0662251656 168% => OK
Sentence length: 15.0 21.2450331126 71% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 31.6025485425 49.2860985944 64% => OK
Chars per sentence: 74.9545454545 110.228320801 68% => OK
Words per sentence: 15.8181818182 21.698381199 73% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.5 7.06452816374 106% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.09492273731 98% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 4.19205298013 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 4.33554083885 161% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 4.45695364238 112% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 10.0 4.27373068433 234% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.469028680004 0.272083759551 172% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.144226381062 0.0996497079465 145% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0533613028914 0.0662205650399 81% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.289365649793 0.162205337803 178% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0640312999139 0.0443174109184 144% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 8.8 13.3589403974 66% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 73.17 53.8541721854 136% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 5.55761589404 56% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 6.8 11.0289183223 62% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.92 12.2367328918 81% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 6.69 8.42419426049 79% => OK
difficult_words: 51.0 63.6247240618 80% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 7.5 10.7273730684 70% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.0 10.498013245 76% => OK
text_standard: 7.0 11.2008830022 62% => The average readability is low. Need to imporve the language.
What are above readability scores?

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Write the essay in 20 minutes.

Rates: 68.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 20.5 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.