Integreted writing-TPO 12
Following to find the accurate identity of a girl teenager depicted in a painting without title which is discovered recently and attributed to the famous novelist of America (1775-1817), Jane Austen, the reading passage poses three reasons that the girl in the painting belongs to Jane Austen. On contrary, the lecture rejects the same reasons and evidences mentioned in the reading passage.
First, based on the reading passage, the Austen’s family, after several decades in 1882, claimed that the girl in the portrait is the picture of Austen by giving permission to use it as illustration of Austen for an edition of her letters. While, lecture explains that the evidence mentioned in the passage is not persuasive because the time of that edition related to 70 years old after the death’s date of Austen when the his descendants had never seen Austen and had no imagination of him.
Second, the reading passage describes that the portrait is similar to the sketch which the Austen sister, Cassandra, had drawn of him when he was adult. It adds that portrait has the subscribe details to those in the sketch like the noise, mouth, overall shape. Lecture, however, poses that there were large number of female teenagers in the relatives of Austen who had lots of resemblances between each other. In addition, according to what a researcher said the portrait is too similar to niece of Austen called Merry Campain.
Finally, according the passage, although portrait had no signature and date, its style is linked to Ozias Humphrey who was hired by his family when Austen was a teenager. On the other hand, lecture describes that there are evidences which contradicts the reason mentioned in the passage. Lecture adds that the style of portrait and its stamp related Black Campus reveals that it was painted and sold by William Leg in London, a decade later than Humphrey, when Austen was 70 years old not a teenager.
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flaws:
No. of Words: 323 250
Don't need to reiterate the contents of reading passages or as less as possible.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 25 in 30
Category: Very Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 11 12
No. of Words: 323 250
No. of Characters: 1557 1200
No. of Different Words: 159 150
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.239 4.2
Average Word Length: 4.82 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.431 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 121 80
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 94 60
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 50 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 26 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 29.364 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 11.072 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.636 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.429 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.647 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.169 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 4