In the presented memo, the business manager of a television station recommends to restore the time devoted to weather and local news to its former level in order to draw more viewers and advertising revenues. At the first glance, this recommendation seems logical. However, the provided evidences cannot fully support his or her argument. To make a more compelling case for the recommendation, the manager should take the following points into consideration.
First, the business manager assumes complaints about coverage of weather and local news means the television station should add more time to these two programs. However, additional evidence is needed to validate this supposition. It is possible that viewers are not satisfied with the content of the news because compared to former programs, current weather and local news do not provided accurate prediction or amusing news. Further, the time arrangements of the two programs may be too late. Most viewer who want to who these programs have to sleep early. In these cases, it will be meaningless to devote more time on the two programs. Therefore, in order to corroborate the argument, the author needs to provide more details.
Second, the manager makes a wrong causal relationship that local business partners canceled their advertising contract due to the decreased time of weather and local news. This is gratuitous and more evidence is needed to rule out other possibilities. Perhaps the local business partners does not have enough money to continue the advertising contract or they have better ways to maximize their profits with the amounts of money. Without giving any further evidence, this causation is not tenable.
Finally, based on the aforementioned points, the author proceeds to propose a far-fetched assertion that the television station should restore time of weather and local news to its former level to attracts more users and avoid losing advertising revenues. Even if the above point that audience complain about the time devoted to the programs, it is plausible that the number of complaints is small while a larger group of viewers like national news. The reduction could cause complaints among these users and thus result in a loss of viewers. In consideration of this, the manager should present more evidence to substantiate the recommendation.
In conclusion, though the argument is not entirely invalid, the presented evidence could not fully support the recommendation. To strengthen it, the author should give more details.
- The following appeared in a memo to the board of directors of Bargain Brand Cereals."One year ago we introduced our first product, Bargain Brand breakfast cereal. Our very low prices quickly drew many customers away from the top-selling cereal companies. 68
- "We recommend that Monarch Books open a café in its store. Monarch, having been in business at the same location for more than twenty years, has a large customer base because it is known for its wide selection of books on all subjects. Clearly, opening 85
- The following is a memorandum from the business manager of a television station."Over the past year, our late-night news program has devoted increased time to national news and less time to weather and local news. During this time period, most of the comp 55
- The following appeared in a memo from the director of a large group of hospitals."In a laboratory study of liquid antibacterial hand soaps, a concentrated solution of UltraClean produced a 40 percent greater reduction in the bacteria population than did t 49
Essay evaluation report
argument 1 -- not OK. need to argue:
During this time period, most of the complaints received from viewers were concerned with our station's coverage of weather and local news.
argument 2 -- OK
argument 3 -- OK
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 21 15
No. of Words: 399 350
No. of Characters: 2074 1500
No. of Different Words: 188 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.469 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.198 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.778 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 157 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 128 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 83 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 43 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 19 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.542 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.524 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.3 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.497 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.044 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 69, Rule ID: ADMIT_ENJOY_VB[1]
Message: This verb is used with the gerund form: 'recommends restoring'.
Suggestion: recommends restoring
...usiness manager of a television station recommends to restore the time devoted to weather and local n...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
finally, first, however, if, may, second, then, therefore, thus, while, in conclusion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 11.0 19.6327345309 56% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 10.0 12.9520958084 77% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 11.1786427146 107% => OK
Relative clauses : 7.0 13.6137724551 51% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 25.0 28.8173652695 87% => OK
Preposition: 54.0 55.5748502994 97% => OK
Nominalization: 23.0 16.3942115768 140% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2131.0 2260.96107784 94% => OK
No of words: 399.0 441.139720559 90% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.34085213033 5.12650576532 104% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.46933824581 4.56307096286 98% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.8749674835 2.78398813304 103% => OK
Unique words: 197.0 204.123752495 97% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.49373433584 0.468620217663 105% => OK
syllable_count: 668.7 705.55239521 95% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 4.96107784431 121% => OK
Article: 12.0 8.76447105788 137% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 2.70958083832 74% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 9.0 4.22255489022 213% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 19.7664670659 106% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 22.8473053892 83% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 58.5972068708 57.8364921388 101% => OK
Chars per sentence: 101.476190476 119.503703932 85% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.0 23.324526521 81% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.04761904762 5.70786347227 71% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.25449101796 19% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 8.20758483034 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 8.0 6.88822355289 116% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.67664670659 86% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.320574317808 0.218282227539 147% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0890136731354 0.0743258471296 120% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.092934768357 0.0701772020484 132% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.175326186143 0.128457276422 136% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0979322684031 0.0628817314937 156% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.2 14.3799401198 92% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 43.73 48.3550499002 90% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 12.197005988 98% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.69 12.5979740519 109% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.5 8.32208582834 102% => OK
difficult_words: 99.0 98.500998004 101% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 12.3882235529 69% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 11.1389221557 86% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.9071856287 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.