Two maps below show an island, before and after the construction of some tourist facilities. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The both pictures below reveal the comparisons between an island before and after improvement of tourism destination facilities.
Exotic island, it is a name for this island after the amelioration of tourist facilities. Before, this island was tepidly island without buildings or any particular place except beach, trees, and sand.
After the construction, the island becomes new destination for tourist. There is a fascinating dock in the middle of the island as the entrance gate for tourist’s ships. When tourists come, they will pass the vehicle track to the reception house. Besides, tourist can get their lunch in the fascinating restaurant behind the reception house. Tourists get a free time to choice the accommodation they want. There are 15 small houses with traditional buildings where tourist could stay vivacity.
The houses of accommodation are divided to two areas in the right and left of the reception house. Tourist could walk across to all houses because the cozy of footpath street.
Tourists do not worry if they want to gracious place of swimming because they can go through to the corner of the island.
Tourists could feel glossy sand and they do not worry about the weather. The tourism developer did not cut off the trees so tourists will feel a breeze sensation.
To sum up, the island becomes a wonderful place to welcome to all tourists after the amelioration.
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Sentence: Before, this island was tepidly island without buildings or any particular place except beach, trees, and sand.
Error: tepidly Suggestion: ?
flaws:
Number of Paragraphs: 7 4
better to have 4 paragraphs:
para 1: introduction
para 2: body 1
para 3: body 2
para 4: conclusion
sample:
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http://www.testbig.com/ielts-essays/graph-below-gives-information-about…
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http://www.testbig.com/ielts-essays/cheart-below-shows-information-abou…
or
para 1: introduction
para 2: conclusion
para 3: body 1
para 4: body 2
sample:
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http://www.testbig.com/ielts-essays/graphs-below-show-types-music-album…
http://www.testbig.com/ielts-essays/table-below-gives-information-about…
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.0 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 1 2
No. of Sentences: 15 10
No. of Words: 229 200
No. of Characters: 1133 1000
No. of Different Words: 126 100
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 3.89 4.0
Average Word Length: 4.948 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.634 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 82 60
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 57 50
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 37 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 25 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 15.267 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 3.235 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.267 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.353 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.685 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.111 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 7 4