The prison system is outdated. No civilized society should punish its criminals: it should rehabilitate them.
According to Oxford Advanced English Dictionary “Criminal offence is an act that is harmful not only to some individual, but also to the community. Such acts are forbidden and punishable by law if a person happens to do a criminal offence he would become a prisoner.” Based on Merriam Webster Dictionary “A prisoner, also known as an inmate, is a person who is deprived of liberty against their will.” Great many individuals believe that rehabilitation is one of the major purposes of the prison. But why should the rehabilitation happen in prison and not in other communities? It is widely believed that the prison system is outdated and no civilized society should punish its criminals, it should rehabilitate them.
Firstly, the punishment model in prison does not deter the prisoner from wanting to go back to prison. Sometimes criminals choose the prison as a place for learning crimes rather than for avoiding crimes. Lack of legal educational programs, teaching job skills, and offering counseling a psychologist would result in uneducated individuals who are more interested in taking the risk of doing immoral acts. Also, there are some who try to follow their leads. Leaders in prison are mostly those who are more intelligent and have greater physical powers than others, and sometimes their punishment is death penalty or to become a lifelong prisoner. These people have great influence on others. There are those who define rehabilitation as a way to help somebody to return to good health or a normal life by providing training or therapy which would prevent prisoner from having a desire to go back to prisons. Although it is true, if we observe the prison conditions, we would see that this is not what happens in real life. And also, if it happens, it would happen to a smaller proportion of prisoners not most of them. Therefore, not only they would be rehabilitated, but also the prison would become a university for learning illegal acts and recidivism rates for prison would become very high.
Secondly, many crimes are committed when the offenders do not think rationally; therefore, unlikely to consider consequences of their crime. Thus, keeping these individuals in a restricted environment not only would not rehabilitate them, but also let them lose their control again. This loss of control because of the torturing acts which happen in prisons and make them irrational. Furthermore, people go to prisons because the society wants to punish them. As a result the society itself might be considered as a violator of human rights and irrational. Government and public could run some communities to teach these prisoners rather than to punish them like animals in cages. Opponents may argue that if prisoners could not modify their behavior or have some mental problems, it is better to keep them away from innocent people in the society. In spite of being right about the responsibility for modifying behaviors, they are wrong about considering prisoners as mentally ill persons. They are not mad mans, they are humans who have committed crime because of losing control over some situations; therefore prisoners should not be infringed from basic rules of human rights such as training courses among other members of society and do not being restricted to prison. Also, punishment is defined as a penalty that is imposed on an individual for doing something wrong. The term rehabilitation is defined as a way to help somebody to return to good health or a normal life by providing training or therapy which is not possible in prisons.
Thirdly, human right is not considered in prisons. The term human right originally refers to the “basic rights and freedoms to which all humans are considered entitled” (The American Heritage Dictionary). Being punished and rehabilitated are secondary to some basic rights, such as having a healthy medical care, educational programs, freedom of speech, religion, and etc., which are violated in prisons. It is observed that the overpopulation of prisoners has an effect on prisoners. The more prisoners we have, the less they would come to authorities’ attention. Most of the time, the medical care system programs in jails are inadequate, for women especially, because the government prefer to save money rather than to spend it on some criminals due to some personal prejudices against them. They should be reminded that all of these individuals are not serial killers. Some of them are accused of some political crimes and to some extent their illegal acts do not have a direct connection with human health. It is often claimed that those who had not respected others human rights, in consequence, have to suffer. Despite the fact that they are to some extent right, it should be remarked that if we behave toward criminals exactly like themselves and following the uncivilized “eye for an eye” type of punishment system, we have not only try to help them to be law abiders but also we have prevented them from having a healthy, useful and active life in jail. Thus, human right is equal for each and every one.
In conclusion, not only rehabilitation happens by restricting individuals in prison but also the rights of the accused person are not considered which is uncivilized. In addition, punishment or rehabilitation cannot be dictated. In this essay I have explained three major reasons for holding this position: punishment model do not deter prisoner from wanting to go back to prison, keeping individuals in a restricted environment would let them lose their control again, and human right is not considered in prisons. Individuals would not prefer harsh treatments. As a result, we have to provide some communities and new facilities such as special universities for people who are accused of immoral acts, no matter what are their age ranges.
Sentence: Most of the time, the medical care system programs in jails are inadequate, for women especially, because the government prefer to save money rather than to spend it on some criminals due to some personal prejudices against them.
Description: The fragment government prefer to is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace prefer with verb, past tense
flaws:
No. of Words: 961 350
For issue essays, around 450 words, for argument essays, around 400 words.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.0 out of 6
Category: Very Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 1 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 43 15
No. of Words: 961 350
No. of Characters: 4750 1500
No. of Different Words: 371 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 5.568 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.943 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.731 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 352 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 248 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 171 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 119 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 22.349 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 11.549 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.558 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.244 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.384 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.137 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5