TOPIC # 48 People work because they need money to live. What are some other reasons that people work?
There is an old English adage that people who have no work or are idle get into trouble. Work has many benefits for man which one of them is financial profits, although it is often the first reason for the majority of people to work. I personally think many people work to enjoy, to gain a social prestige, and to learn some skills.
First, work can be joyful for those who work in their favorite fields. To follow their interests and their heart is the first priority for them rather than earning money. For example, many musicians are so drawn to their notes, instruments, and performances that many hours of working pass like a minute for them because they really enjoy their work. They perform their task sincerely and readily.
Second, social prestige is so significant for some people. One of the first questions that people ask each other when they meet for the first time is “what is your job?”, and they somehow judge each other by the answer to this question. For instance, the treatment given to a manger of a well-known corporation considerably differs from the one given to a blue-collar worker. This is why some persons tend to brag about their jobs and positions so that they can improve their social respect and also self-respect. In addition, mankind needs to feel that he is important, his existence is necessary in some places, and he can successfully fulfill a task as well.
Third, gaining experience and acquiring new skills might be logical reasons for working. At the work place, communicating with different colleagues, gaining further up-to-date information, and implementing our knowledge can be rewarding, and also crucial for some individuals. These experiences can be the main source of wisdom for us to climb up the ladder.
To sum it up, I think apart from having an income, following personal interests, gaining better social position in the community, and practical knowledge motivate people to work harder and get ahead in their life.
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Comments
1. There are no fixed rules
1. There are no fixed rules for essay writings. Whatever is good is better. Depends on the topics, you can develop essays you think it is convenient for you. The repetition issue is not serious.
2. For sure 5-paragraph essay is better.
Full essay evaluations
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 26 in 30
Category: Very Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 16 15
No. of Words: 334 350
No. of Characters: 1591 1500
No. of Different Words: 192 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.275 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.763 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.539 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 105 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 74 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 50 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 37 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 20.875 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.138 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.75 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.312 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.563 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.119 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Dear E-rater
1-I am a little bit confused about the introduction because I had read in some TOEFL advised outlines that it is better to include reasons in the introduction briefly, however according to your previous comments, I also think it seems a little bit repetition...
2- and also is it best to write a 5-paragraph essay or a 4-paragraph one?
Thanks in advance