TOEFL ESSAY You are planning to study abroad What do you think you will like and dislike about this experience Why

Essay topics:

TOEFL ESSAY: You are planning to study abroad. What do you think you will like and dislike about this experience? Why?

Everybody has his own major goals for reaching his ideal life. For many finding a prestigious job with more than enough salary, for others more money for a prosperous living. But in my view, my ideal life moreover than the mentioned aims, involves research, studying and non-stop learning. In order to achieve this aim I have planned to study abroad. Why I came to this decision goes back to the lack of available positions in high tech laboratories and universities in my country. I am quite aware this path has many pros and cons, which I may not like at all, but to reach my aim which I like a lot...

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For many finding a prestigious job with more than enough salary, for others more money for a prosperous living.
Description: what is the verb for this sentence?

I am quite aware this path has many pros and cons,
I am quite aware this path which has many pros and cons,

with the one's you loved before will be annoying.
with the ones you loved before will be annoying.

Sentence: This feeling might sometimes be so much that alters the peoples decision to stay on their path to their goals.
Description: A noun, plural, common is not usually followed by a noun, singular, common
Suggestion: Refer to peoples and decision

flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2

The first paragraph is not developed well.

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 22 in 30
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 19 15
No. of Words: 350 350
No. of Characters: 1613 1500
No. of Different Words: 209 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.325 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.609 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.414 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 99 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 75 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 46 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 27 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 18.421 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.081 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.421 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.27 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.516 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.052 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5