Last year, the number of visits to our local beach in Bridge Bay was 50 percent lower
than the year before. Early last year we ended our contract with Arko Trash Collection, a
company that had serviced local garbage collection for the past twenty years. We switched
at that time to Satellite Waste Corporation, another trash collection company. In nearby
Ocean Harbor, where Arko has continued to provide garbage collection, the beaches are
experiencing record levels of attendance. Meanwhile, in Bridge Bay, complaints about
garbage on our beach have increased this year. Clearly, inadequate garbage collection on
our beach by Satellite has led to the significant drop in visitors. Therefore, in order to
restore visitor numbers to our local beach, we recommend resuming our contract with
Arko as soon as possible
The argument is not cogent enough because of some unwarranted assumptions. Primarily, the argument assumes one particular cause for the declination in attendance in Bridge Bay and has not analyzed other factors which can also affect the downfall, and hence not valid.
The argument imputed poor garbage collection system of Satellite to the declination of attendance in Bridge. However, it may be possible that the previous year people had many long vacations and during those times all of the beaches in that area had an increased attendance. But this year the number of long vacation has decreased and the workload of mass people has increased which results in the declination of attendance in all the beaches not just Bridge. There is also a strong possibility that the average cost required to travel has increased this year and hence people are not willing to spend their money after recreation. The prices of hotels nearby the beaches might also increase which may be a cause of declination in attendance. While people travel they use to take food several times and they enjoy seafood. However, it is possible that this year the price of seafood has been tripled and people read the news published in the national daily which made them reluctant to visit the beaches, not just Bridge. There is also a strong possibility that a major national daily and a television channel has published their report on the increased level of crime near the beaches which might have cowed the traveler and the attendance in all of the beaches have decreased. Had the argument placed strong evidence that the all the other factors controlling the attendance have remained unchanged only than the argument's concern about the decrease in attendance would become more acceptable.
Secondly, the argument states that the nearby Ocean Harbor are experiencing record level of attendance and this is for the fact that Arko company has continued to provide garbage collection there. But it may happen that this year Ocean Harbor has added some new attraction for the visitors: they probably added marine drive facility which is not available in the other beaches at that area. The foods available in Ocean Harbor beach may be fresh and good alongside cheap compared to the foods of Bridge. This may also be true that the road to go to bridge has become bad and the transportation facility to go there has become bad which forces the visitors to go to Ocean which has a good transportation facility and is very near the regional airport. All these facts have made the visitor to go to Ocean not only the garbage factor.
However, it may be also true to the garbage level on the beach is quite similar to the previous year but the people visiting the beach this year are habitually complaining. People who visited this place previously may have not placed any complain because they were tolerable.
The argument is flawed for numerous unwarranted assumptions.
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 19 15
No. of Words: 494 350
No. of Characters: 2414 1500
No. of Different Words: 202 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.714 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.887 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.52 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 165 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 121 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 86 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 52 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 26 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.543 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.737 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.346 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.554 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.123 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 215, Rule ID: ALL_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'all the'.
Suggestion: all the
...y long vacations and during those times all of the beaches in that area had an increased a...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 769, Rule ID: USE_TO_VERB[1]
Message: Did you mean 'used'?
Suggestion: used
...in attendance. While people travel they use to take food several times and they enj...
^^^
Line 5, column 1245, Rule ID: ALL_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'all the'.
Suggestion: all the
...owed the traveler and the attendance in all of the beaches have decreased. Had the argumen...
^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, hence, however, may, second, secondly, so, while
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 19.0 19.6327345309 97% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 12.9520958084 85% => OK
Conjunction : 16.0 11.1786427146 143% => OK
Relative clauses : 20.0 13.6137724551 147% => OK
Pronoun: 32.0 28.8173652695 111% => OK
Preposition: 51.0 55.5748502994 92% => OK
Nominalization: 27.0 16.3942115768 165% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2464.0 2260.96107784 109% => OK
No of words: 494.0 441.139720559 112% => OK
Chars per words: 4.98785425101 5.12650576532 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.71445763274 4.56307096286 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.58858367855 2.78398813304 93% => OK
Unique words: 202.0 204.123752495 99% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.408906882591 0.468620217663 87% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 782.1 705.55239521 111% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 4.96107784431 81% => OK
Article: 7.0 8.76447105788 80% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.70958083832 37% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.67365269461 179% => OK
Preposition: 0.0 4.22255489022 0% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 19.7664670659 96% => OK
Sentence length: 26.0 22.8473053892 114% => OK
Sentence length SD: 58.8104142133 57.8364921388 102% => OK
Chars per sentence: 129.684210526 119.503703932 109% => OK
Words per sentence: 26.0 23.324526521 111% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.10526315789 5.70786347227 54% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.25449101796 57% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 8.20758483034 122% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 8.0 6.88822355289 116% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.67664670659 21% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.126894172487 0.218282227539 58% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0467509687008 0.0743258471296 63% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0423887308241 0.0701772020484 60% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0726895451151 0.128457276422 57% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0354562047539 0.0628817314937 56% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.1 14.3799401198 105% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 45.09 48.3550499002 93% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.4 12.197005988 110% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.96 12.5979740519 95% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.96 8.32208582834 96% => OK
difficult_words: 95.0 98.500998004 96% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 12.3882235529 89% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.4 11.1389221557 111% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.9071856287 101% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.