Some people think that parents should teach children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the place to learn this.Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

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Some people think that parents should teach children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the place to learn this.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

It is obvious that both parents and school have vital role to educate children how to be good members of society. Not only should parents only pay attention to how to keep their children safe of several damage that might happen but they should also pay utmost attention to how to teach them being good members for their society and also schools should provide them with golden opportunity to be useful members for their society in the near future.

It is clear that parents are the first people who children interact with so they have important duties to rear their children how to obey several rules and obligations that they have in their society. Children must be taught how respect to several values and obey them in their life. In other words, parents should prepare them to learn what aim of life is and they are able to be good members of community when they obey all rules that they have in their society which would not be in the case if parents did not pay more attention to rear their children in straight way. For instants when parents do not respect to human rights and they are illegal people in their society little by little impact on their children and make several irreversible damage because their children are taught easily and their parents conduct them in the bad way.

Moreover, schools have significant role to teach children how behave in their society to get success in the near future because when they go to school, they can learn how to cooperate with each other to gain success and their school provide them with golden opportunity to experience several team work situation and force them obey several rules and obligation that are practiced in their schools. Teachers teach them several useful skills and moral values that they need in the near future to be good members of society. In the schools, children are taught how work with the other students and respect to their beliefs which lead to being good person since the main important characteristic that the good person must be have is to respect to different kind of beliefs that people have.

In conclusion, I think that both parents and schools should accustom children to obey rules and obligations and give them vital advice about human rights which lead to being useful members of society. It is noticeable that every one who lives in the society has responsibility to help younger generation to become active and prepare to be good.

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2012-09-22 maryam2900 68 view
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Sentence: Not only should parents only pay attention to how to keep their children safe of several damage that might happen but they should also pay utmost attention to how to teach them being good members for their society and also schools should provide them with golden opportunity to be useful members for their society in the near future.

Not only...but also is not used properly in this sentence.

Sentence: It is clear that parents are the first people who children interact with so they have important duties to rear their children how to obey several rules and obligations that they have in their society.
Description: A WH-pronoun, nominative is not usually followed by a noun, plural, common
Suggestion: Refer to who and children

flaws:
No. of Different Words: 153 200
Avg. Sentence Length: 38.364 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 16.227 7.5

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.0 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 2 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 11 15
No. of Words: 422 350
No. of Characters: 1984 1500
No. of Different Words: 153 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.532 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.701 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.234 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 138 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 96 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 41 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 23 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 38.364 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 16.227 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.545 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.487 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.672 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.299 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5