The following appeared in a memo from the director of student housing at Buckingham College.
"To serve the housing needs of our students, Buckingham College should build a number of new dormitories. Buckingham's enrollment is growing and, based on current trends, will double over the next 50 years, thus making existing dormitory space inadequate. Moreover, the average rent for an apartment in our town has risen in recent years. Consequently, students will find it increasingly difficult to afford off-campus housing. Finally, attractive new dormitories would make prospective students more likely to enroll at Buckingham."
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
In the memo from the director of student housing at Buckingham College it is stated that, Buckingham college should build a number of new dormitories.It is supported by the recent upward trend in average rent for an apartment in the town.However, this belief is based on several ungrounded premises whihc should be addressed with sound evidences before any action is taken.
First of all, the author should provide evidence that the enrollment in Buckingham college will double in the next 50 years. It might be the case that the recent trends may be insignificant in the long run and the overall enrollments may remain the same. Also, it is possible that new colleges may come up in the neighbouring region reducing the students per college. It is Also possible that students might prefer these other new colleges over buckingham college. The author needs to provide evidence regarding the predicted rise, Perhaps in the student population in the form of Scientific research study.
Second of all, the author should provide more information about the average rent and how it has risen quantitatively. Perhaps the average rent for apartments in the town are still very economical for students. It may also be also be the case that the average rent in the town is not representative of the rent in the apartments that students prefer live in. Maybe, the average has been skewed to a higher value due to some new luxury apartments which might have been constructed at the edge of the town, not occupied by students due to large distance and consequently prolonged commuting times. The author needs to present some evidence to support his claim that apartment rents have risen to a point where they are out of the budgets of majority of the students.
Lastly, the author assumes that new dormitories would make prospective students more likely to choose Buckingham over other colleges. However, this might not be the case, it is possible that other factors might be more important to choose colleges. Perhaps students prioritize job opportunities and teaching faculty more than any other factor, Since most of them might want to get a job after graduating from college. The author needs to confirm through a scientific survey that students have new dormitories as the deciding factor while enrolling for a college for his argument to hold water.
In conclusion, It is possible that stundent enrollment may increase and consequently, Buckingham college should build new dormitories. However, unless evidence is provided for the aforementioned, The arguement as it stands now is considerably flawed and it is neccessary to provide more evidence to evaluate the argument and decide the course of action.
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 17 15
No. of Words: 446 350
No. of Characters: 2215 1500
No. of Different Words: 199 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.596 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.966 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.721 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 164 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 122 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 86 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 49 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 26.235 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 11.435 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.882 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.373 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.595 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.153 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 151, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: It
...hould build a number of new dormitories.It is supported by the recent upward trend...
^^
Line 1, column 239, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: However
...erage rent for an apartment in the town.However, this belief is based on several ungrou...
^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 218, Rule ID: PHRASE_REPETITION[1]
Message: This phrase is duplicated. You should probably leave only 'also be'.
Suggestion: also be
...ll very economical for students. It may also be also be the case that the average rent in the t...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, consequently, first, however, if, lastly, may, regarding, second, so, still, while, in conclusion, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 23.0 19.6327345309 117% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 18.0 12.9520958084 139% => OK
Conjunction : 7.0 11.1786427146 63% => OK
Relative clauses : 14.0 13.6137724551 103% => OK
Pronoun: 30.0 28.8173652695 104% => OK
Preposition: 57.0 55.5748502994 103% => OK
Nominalization: 15.0 16.3942115768 91% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2274.0 2260.96107784 101% => OK
No of words: 444.0 441.139720559 101% => OK
Chars per words: 5.12162162162 5.12650576532 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.5903493882 4.56307096286 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.81724618471 2.78398813304 101% => OK
Unique words: 206.0 204.123752495 101% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.463963963964 0.468620217663 99% => OK
syllable_count: 715.5 705.55239521 101% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 9.0 4.96107784431 181% => OK
Article: 8.0 8.76447105788 91% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 2.70958083832 74% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 19.7664670659 86% => OK
Sentence length: 26.0 22.8473053892 114% => OK
Sentence length SD: 65.9920829896 57.8364921388 114% => OK
Chars per sentence: 133.764705882 119.503703932 112% => OK
Words per sentence: 26.1176470588 23.324526521 112% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.88235294118 5.70786347227 121% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.25449101796 57% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 6.0 8.20758483034 73% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 6.88822355289 44% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 8.0 4.67664670659 171% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.262794050896 0.218282227539 120% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0910963274933 0.0743258471296 123% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0962458106598 0.0701772020484 137% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.170153213478 0.128457276422 132% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0982206826784 0.0628817314937 156% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.7 14.3799401198 109% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 45.09 48.3550499002 93% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.4 12.197005988 110% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.71 12.5979740519 101% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.41 8.32208582834 101% => OK
difficult_words: 98.0 98.500998004 99% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 18.0 12.3882235529 145% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.4 11.1389221557 111% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.9071856287 109% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.