Some people believe that the government should not provide financial assistance to artists because it is a waste of money. Others think that they all should benefit, including painters, musicians and poets.
Discuss both points of view and give your opinion.
Whether financial aid should be provided to another, smaller art forms is a matter of personal intrest.
Proponents will be, in most cases, the artists themselves. They will believe that without the support of the government, a big part of our everyday culture can be lost our never discovered. Art fanatics will also support this statement because they can enjoy the art and want to discover new artists and artforms.
Opponents, whom most likely will be the biggest group, will not have a hard time finding arguments against the proposal. In these times of crisis, the last thing people want is a raise of their taxes. In addition, they can argument that the government should use their money for better purposes like education and the maintenance of infrastructure. A surprising group of opponents could be other artists, whom do get financial support. Reasons could be that their aid from the government will reduce to finance the smaller artists. In addition, the support could mean some serious competition and reduce their income due to the spread off their fans over other artists.
In my opinion, the financial assistance off all artists is not e good proposal. In these times, there are millions of people practicing arts like painting and writing music. If their artwork is good enough, they will be discovered by headhunters in the business and they will most likely be supported this way.
In conclusion, the financial aid off all artists in not something the government should take in consideration. The disadvantages clearly outweigh the advantages for most people. Arts are important for everyone, but not the most important subject in the everyday life.
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a big part of our everyday culture can be lost our never discovered.
Description: can you re-write this sentence?
Opponents, whom most likely will be the biggest group,
Opponents, who most likely will be the biggest group,
whom do get financial support.
who do get financial support.
they will most likely be supported this way.
they will most likely be supported by this way.
Sentence: In addition, they can argument that the government should use their money for better purposes like education and the maintenance of infrastructure.
Description: A modal auxillary is not usually followed by a noun, singular, common
Suggestion: Refer to can and argument
Sentence: In addition, the support could mean some serious competition and reduce their income due to the spread off their fans over other artists.
Description: The word due is not usually used as a noun, singular, common
Suggestion: Refer to due
Sentence: In conclusion, the financial aid off all artists in not something the government should take in consideration.
Description: The token in is not usually followed by a negator
Suggestion: Refer to in and not
Sentence: Whether financial aid should be provided to another, smaller art forms is a matter of personal intrest.
Error: intrest Suggestion: interest
Sentence: Art fanatics will also support this statement because they can enjoy the art and want to discover new artists and artforms.
Error: artforms Suggestion: No alternate word
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 7 2
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.0 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 7 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 2 2
No. of Sentences: 16 15
No. of Words: 275 350
No. of Characters: 1361 1500
No. of Different Words: 145 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.072 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.949 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.616 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 97 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 81 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 50 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 32 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 17.188 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 4.517 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.5 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.313 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.557 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.034 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5