The following appeared in a memo from the vice president of Butler Manufacturing.
"During the past year, workers at Butler Manufacturing reported 30 percent more on-the-job accidents than workers at nearby Panoply Industries, where the work shifts are one hour shorter than ours. A recent government study reports that fatigue and sleep deprivation among workers are significant contributing factors in many on-the-job accidents. If we shorten each of our work shifts by one hour, we can improve Butler Manufacturing's safety record by ensuring that our employees are adequately rested."
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
As stated in the memo, the vice precident of Butler Manufacturing comes to the conclusion that reducing each work shift by one hour will reduce the number of accidents in the company based on the evidence from nearby Panoply Industries and a study by government that reports fatigue and sleep deprivation among workders are a significant contributing factors in many on-the-job accidents. However, before the recommendation be properly evaluated, one would need the following pieces of evidence.
Firstly, before comparing the number of accidents with nearby Panoply Industries, we should understand the nature of the work carried at both the industries. It is possible that the nature of work at both the industries is markedly different - perhaps the work at Butler Manufacturing involves working alongside fast moving machinery while the work in Panoply Industries involves working with machinery that is easily managable with humans. Futher, there is possibility that work at Butler Manufacturing necessiates workers to be on their toes frequently while the workers in Panoply Industries have a sedantry working style. If either of the scenarios have merit, then the authors recommendation will not have the desired effect.
Secondly, the author anticipates that the workers will be relieved of fatigue by decreasing each shift by one hour by fallaciously assuming the workers will use the given time for taking rest. However, this assumption is a facial, inasmuch as the author does not provide any information about any policy that would entail them to take rest in the provided time. It is possible that the workers would use their extra free time to hang out with their colleagues instead of resting. Moreover, there is a possibility that the worker misutilize their extra free time to carry out some other obligations that they might have. Consequently, the workers will be doing what they are intended to do and thus reducing the shifts by one hour may not prove to fruitful.
Lastly, we should know about the safety protocols that are being followed at Butler Manufacturing. The work at Butler Manufacturing might require high safety standards for the workers to work without sustaining any injuries. It is possible that the accidents at Butler Manufacturing are higher than that of Panoply Industries due the lack of proper safety measures at Butler Manufacturing. In that case, the vice president's argument will be significantly weakened as the accidents will be caused do to lack of adequate safety measures even though the workers take enough rest to subjugate fatigue and sleep deprivation.
Therefore, the argument, as it stands, is unpersuasive as the author does not provide any evidence about the type of work at Butler Manufacturing, whether the workers do actually use their extra free time to take rest or if Butler Manufacturing follows necessary safety protocols for the workers.
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Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 11 2
No. of Sentences: 16 15
No. of Words: 464 350
No. of Characters: 2402 1500
No. of Different Words: 202 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.641 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.177 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.849 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 183 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 134 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 95 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 64 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 29 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 12.515 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.688 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.372 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.609 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.171 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 675, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...r of the scenarios have merit, then the authors recommendation will not have the desire...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, but, consequently, first, firstly, however, if, lastly, may, moreover, second, secondly, so, then, therefore, thus, while
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 20.0 19.6327345309 102% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 16.0 12.9520958084 124% => OK
Conjunction : 5.0 11.1786427146 45% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 14.0 13.6137724551 103% => OK
Pronoun: 29.0 28.8173652695 101% => OK
Preposition: 64.0 55.5748502994 115% => OK
Nominalization: 12.0 16.3942115768 73% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2458.0 2260.96107784 109% => OK
No of words: 464.0 441.139720559 105% => OK
Chars per words: 5.2974137931 5.12650576532 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.64119157421 4.56307096286 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.92210824828 2.78398813304 105% => OK
Unique words: 209.0 204.123752495 102% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.450431034483 0.468620217663 96% => OK
syllable_count: 783.9 705.55239521 111% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 4.96107784431 121% => OK
Article: 6.0 8.76447105788 68% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 2.70958083832 221% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 16.0 19.7664670659 81% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 29.0 22.8473053892 127% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 78.7398554974 57.8364921388 136% => OK
Chars per sentence: 153.625 119.503703932 129% => OK
Words per sentence: 29.0 23.324526521 124% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.1875 5.70786347227 143% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.25449101796 19% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 8.20758483034 97% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.67664670659 86% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.388102924291 0.218282227539 178% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.136089540211 0.0743258471296 183% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.103162398689 0.0701772020484 147% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.22802553069 0.128457276422 178% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0788787615466 0.0628817314937 125% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 18.0 14.3799401198 125% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 33.58 48.3550499002 69% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 15.8 12.197005988 130% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.05 12.5979740519 112% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.61 8.32208582834 103% => OK
difficult_words: 104.0 98.500998004 106% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 19.0 12.3882235529 153% => OK
gunning_fog: 13.6 11.1389221557 122% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.9071856287 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.