The graph and table below show the average monthly temperatures and the average number of hours of sunshine per year in three major cities.

Essay topics:

The graph and table below show the average monthly temperatures and the average number of hours of sunshine per year in three major cities.

These data provide a breakdown of information in term of average temperatures and annual hours of sunshine in London, New York, and Sydney. At first glance, what stands out from the line graph and the table reveal that London is by far the coldest city and has the fewest hours of sunshine. New York has the hottest summers, but Sydney enjoys the warmest overall climate.

The temperatures pattern for London and New York are similar, although New York has warmer summer and colder winter. In both cities, peaks occur in July-August, at 23 in London and 29 in New York. In contrast, Sydney’s hottest weather is in December/January when temperatures average 25. Over this time frame, New York’s temperatures dip to an average of around 5, compared with 8 in London. On the other hand, Sydney’s lowest average temperatures in July are just over 150.

As far as hours of sunshine are concerned, New York and Sydney have similar averages of 2,535 and 2,437 hours respectively. London, however, has a much lower average of 1,180 hours.

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when temperatures average 25
when the average temperatures are 25

The temperatures pattern for London and New York are similar,
The temperature's pattern...is similar,

flaws:
You forget the tend for the last few months in the second paragraph.

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.0 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
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Fourth Root of Number of Words: 3.647 4.0
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Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.126 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 3 4