The line chart below shows the results of a survey giving the reasons why people moved to the capital city of a particular country

Submitted by vdzung261 on Thu, 08/26/2021 - 13:27

The line graph describes the results of a survey about motivating factors for people relocating to the capital city of a specific country.
Overall, it can be seen that when compares the figure of the first year with the last year, all the reasons lead to the relocation rose up, and study was the one which had a remarkable upward trend. Moreover, during this period of time, almost people relocated to the capital city because of employment.
According to the graph, in 15 years, all the figures for relocating reasons increased, particularly the number citizen went to the capital for adventure grew by about 5000 people, for relatives went up by roughly 10 000 people, for study approximately 70 000 people and for employment around 30 000 people. Therefore, with just the second highest number in 2000 of over 20 000 people, the migration’s figure due to study climbed slightly to 55 000 people in 2010, then surged to nearly 90 000 people and became the most significant growth.
Furthermore, it is evident that employment was the reason which received the highest number of immigrant, and adventure received the lowest. Nonetheless, while the number of people emigrating for discovery just went up slightly from 10 000 in 2000 to about 15 000 in 2015 and didn’t have any volatility; that for employment rose considerably from 60 000 people in 2000 to above 90 000 people in 2010 then fell a little bit and got the final result equal to that of study in 2015.

Votes
Average: 8.2 (3 votes)
Essay Categories
IELTS Writing Task I - IELTS Academic

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 221, Rule ID: PERIOD_OF_TIME[1]
Message: Use simply 'period'.
Suggestion: period
...ble upward trend. Moreover, during this period of time, almost people relocated to the capital...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 413, Rule ID: LITTLE_BIT[1]
Message: Reduce redundancy by using 'little' or 'bit'.
Suggestion: little; bit
...above 90 000 people in 2010 then fell a little bit and got the final result equal to that ...
^^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
first, furthermore, if, moreover, nonetheless, second, so, then, therefore, while

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 4.0 7.0 57% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 1.0 1.00243902439 100% => OK
Conjunction : 6.0 6.8 88% => OK
Relative clauses : 7.0 3.15609756098 222% => Less relative clauses wanted (maybe 'which' is over used).
Pronoun: 7.0 5.60731707317 125% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 44.0 33.7804878049 130% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 3.97073170732 126% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1219.0 965.302439024 126% => OK
No of words: 254.0 196.424390244 129% => OK
Chars per words: 4.79921259843 4.92477711251 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 3.99216450694 3.73543355544 107% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.66074456856 2.65546596893 100% => OK
Unique words: 134.0 106.607317073 126% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.527559055118 0.547539520022 96% => OK
syllable_count: 359.1 283.868780488 127% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.45097560976 96% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 1.53170731707 196% => OK
Article: 2.0 4.33902439024 46% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 1.07073170732 93% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 0.482926829268 414% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 4.0 3.36585365854 119% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 7.0 8.94146341463 78% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 36.0 22.4926829268 160% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 82.9300172139 43.030603864 193% => OK
Chars per sentence: 174.142857143 112.824112599 154% => OK
Words per sentence: 36.2857142857 22.9334400587 158% => OK
Discourse Markers: 11.5714285714 5.23603664747 221% => Less transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 3.83414634146 104% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 1.69756097561 118% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 3.70975609756 135% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 0.0 1.13902439024 0% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.09268292683 49% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.146114943404 0.215688989381 68% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0878362260498 0.103423049105 85% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.073936321514 0.0843802449381 88% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.121405868237 0.15604864568 78% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0758964096677 0.0819641961636 93% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 19.3 13.2329268293 146% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 51.86 61.2550243902 85% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 6.51609756098 172% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 15.0 10.3012195122 146% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.15 11.4140731707 98% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.28 8.06136585366 103% => OK
difficult_words: 46.0 40.7170731707 113% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.5 11.4329268293 127% => OK
gunning_fog: 16.4 10.9970731707 149% => OK
text_standard: 15.0 11.0658536585 136% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------

Rates: 73.0337078652 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 6.5 Out of 9
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 221, Rule ID: PERIOD_OF_TIME[1]
Message: Use simply 'period'.
Suggestion: period
...ble upward trend. Moreover, during this period of time, almost people relocated to the capital...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 413, Rule ID: LITTLE_BIT[1]
Message: Reduce redundancy by using 'little' or 'bit'.
Suggestion: little; bit
...above 90 000 people in 2010 then fell a little bit and got the final result equal to that ...
^^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
first, furthermore, if, moreover, nonetheless, second, so, then, therefore, while

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 4.0 7.0 57% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 1.0 1.00243902439 100% => OK
Conjunction : 6.0 6.8 88% => OK
Relative clauses : 7.0 3.15609756098 222% => Less relative clauses wanted (maybe 'which' is over used).
Pronoun: 7.0 5.60731707317 125% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 44.0 33.7804878049 130% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 3.97073170732 126% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1219.0 965.302439024 126% => OK
No of words: 254.0 196.424390244 129% => OK
Chars per words: 4.79921259843 4.92477711251 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 3.99216450694 3.73543355544 107% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.66074456856 2.65546596893 100% => OK
Unique words: 134.0 106.607317073 126% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.527559055118 0.547539520022 96% => OK
syllable_count: 359.1 283.868780488 127% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.45097560976 96% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 1.53170731707 196% => OK
Article: 2.0 4.33902439024 46% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 1.07073170732 93% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 0.482926829268 414% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 4.0 3.36585365854 119% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 7.0 8.94146341463 78% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 36.0 22.4926829268 160% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 82.9300172139 43.030603864 193% => OK
Chars per sentence: 174.142857143 112.824112599 154% => OK
Words per sentence: 36.2857142857 22.9334400587 158% => OK
Discourse Markers: 11.5714285714 5.23603664747 221% => Less transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 3.83414634146 104% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 1.69756097561 118% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 3.70975609756 135% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 0.0 1.13902439024 0% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.09268292683 49% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.146114943404 0.215688989381 68% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0878362260498 0.103423049105 85% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.073936321514 0.0843802449381 88% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.121405868237 0.15604864568 78% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0758964096677 0.0819641961636 93% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 19.3 13.2329268293 146% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 51.86 61.2550243902 85% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 6.51609756098 172% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 15.0 10.3012195122 146% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.15 11.4140731707 98% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.28 8.06136585366 103% => OK
difficult_words: 46.0 40.7170731707 113% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.5 11.4329268293 127% => OK
gunning_fog: 16.4 10.9970731707 149% => OK
text_standard: 15.0 11.0658536585 136% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------

Rates: 73.0337078652 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 6.5 Out of 9
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.