When a country develops its technology, the traditional skills and ways of life die out. It is pointless to try and keep them alive. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
It is clear that thanks to developing technology, ways of life are changed significantly and people can live ten times as comfortable as they lived in the past. Although developing technology lead to improving ways of life, it can not be overlooked that traditional skills and ways of life in the past had noticeable role to develop technology and they act as foot stones.
On the one hand, it is obvious that ways of life and traditional skills show the history of a country. Furthermore, they show how they could expand their technology. For instance, it can not be overlooked that after World War 2, traditional skills and ways of life in Japan, helped them to get successful. It is clear that methods of management lead to developing technology in Japan since many of their factories and industry are destroyed during war.
On the other hand, expanding technology helps people to keep their traditional skills and methods of life alive. For example, medical advanced lead to increasing health and decreasing dead rate. Obviously these days, traditional medicine and technology join to each other and create new methods to heal people at the short time which would never happen if people wanted to lay on only traditional skills. More over, some technologies such as internet provide people with golden opportunity to share their traditional skills together from all over the world. People would not be able to know about their traditional skill if they wanted to follow traditional ways of life and little by little these skills disappeared.
In conclusion, I believe that technology and traditional skills have mutual relationship with each other. In other words, developing technology not only does not destroy the traditional skills and ways of life but also can help them to be alive for next generations. We can not ignored that these days technology plays vital role in our life since help us to transform our skills to future and gain a lot of traditional skills from the past.
| Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
|---|---|---|---|
| 2012-11-09 | maryam2900 | 76 | view |
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Comments
please explain for me" not
please explain for me" not only...but also"
Remember "not only...but
Remember "not only...but also" is for parallel structure.
When not only is followed by but also (or simply but), it's considered good form to make sure the parts that follow each set of words are formatted the same way.
He is not only a great swimmer, but also a great musician. (Good: the sentence uses two noun clauses, which are bold.)
He is not only a great swimmer, but also plays amazing music. (Bad: the sentence uses a noun clause and a verb clause. It's bad because they don't match.)
You could make the second example better by rewriting it with two verb clauses:
He not only swims with ease, but also plays amazing music.
Let us know if you didn't get the point.
Good to see the sentences are shorter.
Still there are some problems:
1. remove repetitive words like 'It is clear...','it is obvious...'.
2. again you didn't use 'not only...but also' properly.
3. 'On the other hand' doesn't mean 'On another hand'. It means 'However'. So you used it wrongly in the essay.
4. You need to know how to write the essay body:
You: reasons + examples
Correct way: reasons + why reasons(some arguments) + examples + small conclusions.
Let us know if you didn't get the point.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.0 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 14 15
No. of Words: 333 350
No. of Characters: 1626 1500
No. of Different Words: 160 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.272 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.883 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.719 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 102 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 69 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 55 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 48 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 23.786 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.975 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.643 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.422 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.6 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.167 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5