Some parents offer their school age children money for each high grade mark they get in school Do you think this is a good idea Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer

Essay topics:

Some parents offer their school-age children money for each high grade (mark) they get in school. Do you think this is a good idea? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

In this day and age, money is considered needed awards when people complete tasks whose thesis appears in the education as well. While some people believe that children can receive money when they get high marks, some people ascertain that this idea has drawbacks. I strongly advocate this assumption due to the myriads benefits it brings.
To begin with, with reward, children’s motivation can be boosted which encourages students to study harder. For example, in my childhood, I ambitiously achieved high academic performance in order to obtain gifts from my parents. This implies that I could have more motivation to study which helped me to stay in honor for many years which reach the goal of improving my study. Besides that, in Viet Nam, many children positively behave because they can get materialism when they finish their duty so that they tend to help their parents or grandparents frequently.
Another benefit when children can get awards when having high grades is that they can use the money to buy equipment they need for study and learn how to manage money at a young age. With their own budget, students can buy school stuff that supplies them with tools to achieve knowledge easier. For example, in math, children can study well without a calculator or compass but the percentage is low; hence, children can lessen the challenging assignments from school. Moreover, when having money at a young age, children can practice and gradually master the managing money skills which are necessary for them in the future. Many adults still cannot learn how to regulate money flow well which leads them to be in debt at the end of the month. This is also the reason why there are many financial skills classes for adults at the moment because they did not have opportunities to train this skill in the past.
All things considered, with great advantages from the correlation of money and awards with high marks, children are the ones who get all that benefit.

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Comments

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, besides, but, hence, if, moreover, so, still, well, while, for example, to begin with

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 9.0 15.1003584229 60% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 9.8082437276 122% => OK
Conjunction : 7.0 13.8261648746 51% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 21.0 11.0286738351 190% => OK
Pronoun: 35.0 43.0788530466 81% => OK
Preposition: 42.0 52.1666666667 81% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 8.0752688172 87% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1640.0 1977.66487455 83% => OK
No of words: 334.0 407.700716846 82% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.91017964072 4.8611393121 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.27500489853 4.48103885553 95% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.44589339352 2.67179642975 92% => OK
Unique words: 183.0 212.727598566 86% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.547904191617 0.524837075471 104% => OK
syllable_count: 488.7 618.680645161 79% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 9.59856630824 42% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.51792114695 57% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 9.0 4.94265232975 182% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 14.0 20.6003584229 68% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 23.0 20.1344086022 114% => OK
Sentence length SD: 30.7471584883 48.9658058833 63% => OK
Chars per sentence: 117.142857143 100.406767564 117% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.8571428571 20.6045352989 116% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.5 5.45110844103 119% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 5.5376344086 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 11.8709677419 67% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.258039110558 0.236089414692 109% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0901810223835 0.076458572812 118% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0587862086905 0.0737576698707 80% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.150099648603 0.150856017488 99% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0494848440039 0.0645574589148 77% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.6 11.7677419355 116% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 56.59 58.1214874552 97% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 10.1575268817 109% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.49 10.9000537634 105% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.23 8.01818996416 103% => OK
difficult_words: 73.0 86.8835125448 84% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 10.002688172 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 10.0537634409 111% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.