The market for the luxury-good industry is on the decline. Recent reports show that a higher unemployment rate, coupled with a customers fears, has decreased the amount of money the average household spends on both essential and nonessential items, but especially on nonessential items. Since luxury goods are by nature, nonessential, this market will be the first to decrease in the present economic climate, and luxury retails should focus their attention to lower-priced markets.
At the first glance, the argument that luxury retails should focus their attention to lower price markets as result of economical decline, sounds plausible. However, with a careful observation, the argument shows certain flaws in crucial assumptions which decrease the argument's strength.
First of all, according to the reports, a higher unemployment rate and customers fear have caused decrease in sale of luxury goods. Important question is what kind of reports are presented? How many people and of what age and profession are included in statistics? The argument assumes the sample is representative. However, if the reports show a local trend, related to a small community, it does not mean that the whole country is in the same condition. Report made in a rural area or in the poorest regions of a country would not show the real picture.
Secondly, in a economic crisis, a lower class has the hardest time dealing with all consequences. Low class is characterized by population with a low level of education, which seeks seasonal and physical works. If a company has to reduce a number of employees, cuts are going to be made on the workers with the worst educational background. Skilful workers with high educational level and experience would be preserved. Experts are a valuable source for a company and they would not lose their jobs, also they are the part of a society which usually buy luxury goods. Preserving their jobs, they would not really feel the crisis, therefore, they would still buy expensive good in the same amount they used to buy them.
In relation to the previous point, the low class workers usually do not buy expensive things. Majorly, their income serves for buying essential items. Hence, the idea that luxury retails should focus on lower price markets would not have an effect. In addition, there is a question if a high class would like to buy luxury goods which are cheap and do not poses quality which they used to.
Further on, the main assumption is the decline in the market is caused by an economic crisis. However, there might be some other reasons. The unlimited possibilities can be made here. The marked could be saturated with same goods, there could be another fashion trend, different activist has been fighting against fur and objects made from rare wood and so on.
In conclusion, the argument is not convincing. The evidence to support the conclusion that luxury retails should focus on lower-price markets due to economical decline and unemployment, do little to prove that conclusion. In order to strength the argument, the writer has to improve his evidence. On the first place, the report has to show the state in the whole country and to prove that all levels of a society are severely affected by the crisis.
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Comments
Hi! Thank you a lot for your
Hi! Thank you a lot for your response.
However, I have some questions:
1. Why should I not question the reports? In some examples of GRE argument essays, there is a question about how good is a survey (I think that is an essay with a score 6). At least, when is allowed to question these facts?
2. If you say that the reports are representative and show the state in a whole country, with so high unemployment, why is wrong to assume that the state is in some kind of economic crisis?
3.With the "argument 2" I wanted to show that in a state with high unemployement, low class workers are always in a danger to lose their jobe since they are replacible workers (not skilfull, high educated, one of a kind experts). So the fallowing argument continues to that.
1. For GRE essays, you will
1. For GRE essays, you will have to accept all survey or studies are true, but try to find out loopholes behind the survey or study. The correct way to deal with survey or study is like this:
a. Yes, it works for time A, but it doesn't mean it works for time B.
b. Yes, it works for location A, but it doesn't mean it works for location B.
c. Yes, it works for people A, but it doesn't mean it works for people B.
d. Yes, it works for event A, but it doesn't mean it works for event B.
....
for this survey, we can find the fault in NO.c 'it works for people A, but it doesn't mean it works for people B.'. Look, the survey works for 'the average household', it doesn't work for 'above average household' and 'under average household'.
also we may find the fault from NO.a 'it works for time A, but it doesn't mean it works for time B'. Maybe after a while, the condition gets better.
It didn't mention whether it is a national survey or local survey, so we can't go NO.b.
2. Look at this 'The market for the luxury-good industry is on the decline', maybe it is a seasonal decline. It doesn't mean it is an 'economic crisis'.
3. First of all, it doesn't need to make something new like 'low class' or 'high class', second, the question should lead to whether they can contribute to the lower-priced markets or not.
argument 1 -- not OK. Suppose the samples are representative, and the local community and the whole country have the same trend. How are you going to argue?
argument 2 -- you made something new:
'a lower class has the hardest time dealing with all consequences. Low class is characterized by population with a low level of education, which seeks seasonal and physical works. If a company has to reduce a number of employees, cuts are going to be made on the workers with the worst educational background. Skilful workers with high educational level and experience would be preserved. Experts are a valuable source for a company and they would not lose their jobs, also they are the part of a society which usually buy luxury goods.'
argument 3 -- OK
argument 4 -- how did you get 'an economic crisis' from the topic? Look, it is 'in the present economic climate'
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for this essay, need to argue against the conclusion:
1. this market will be the first to decrease in the present economic climate,
2. and luxury retails should focus their attention to lower-priced markets>.
however:
lower-priced markets is not equal to essential items.
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suggested:
Maybe average household still can't contribute to the lower-priced markets.
and those above average household still want the higher-priced markets.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Score: ? out of 6
Category: ? Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 26 15
No. of Words: 468 350
No. of Characters: 2243 1500
No. of Different Words: 223 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.651 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.793 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.53 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 157 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 119 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 70 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 43 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 18 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.711 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.577 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.253 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.494 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.064 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 6 5