You are looking for a part-time job .
Write a letter to an employment agency. In your letter
• introduce yourself
• explain what sort of job you would like
• and say what experience and skills you have
Dear Sir,
My name is James. I am a third year student of Wilson College studying electrical engineering. Besides speaking English, I can very well speak and write in German and French.
Since starting from next month I would be having my summer vacations. I am looking out for a part time job. Moreover, I would be available for complete day on the weekends and do not mind to work both Saturday and Sunday.
Last year I had worked in one of the eminent software companies as a junior programmer. Unfortunately, I have to leave that job in between as normally IT job demands more time and that is not possible because of my morning college lectures. I do not mind doing a job in software industry; however, with a sepcial condition that I can only devote 4 to 5 hours on the weekdays and avaiable full day on the weekends.
In terms of skills, I am a computer literate and know basic as well as advanced computer techniques. Moreover, my communication skills are pretty ok as I am fluent in written and spoken English. Additionally, I am hard working with a positive attitude towards work.
I would be grateful to you if I get an opportunity to work as a part time.
I am looking forward to hearing soon from you.
Yours faithfully
James
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Comments
Dear Sir, Many thanks for
Dear Sir,
Many thanks for correcting the mistakes. I have re-write some of the sentences. Can you please reevaluate.
Many thanks
7.0 out of 9 don't use
7.0 out of 9
don't use 'pretty OK' in essay writing
starting next month
starting from next month
I have to leave that job in between as the job demands more time
I have to leave that job as the job demands more time
This time also, I am looking out for similar kind of a job;
Description: can you re-write this sentence?
I would be grateful to your employment agency, if I would get a job offer to work as a part time.
Description: can you re-write this sentence?
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.5 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 15 10
No. of Words: 224 200
No. of Characters: 968 1000
No. of Different Words: 133 100
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 3.869 4.0
Average Word Length: 4.321 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.624 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 68 60
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 53 50
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 32 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 13 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 14.933 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.243 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.467 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.383 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.692 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.095 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 4