In some countries, young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies.
Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this.
Nowadays, some people assume that encouraging children to take
possession of a sense of competition should be thought while other
argue that teaching children about co-operate is more ideal. However,
there are several advantages and disadvantages from both of views. I,
with this essay, want to provide those of advantages and
disadvantages.
Children who scientist researched having good ability in memorizing
are able to learn fast whenever they get something new. This condition
admonishes every parent to be careful for choosing method which can be
thought. Teaching about co-operate is great to be taken in order to
children can grow as nice person who cares about relationship among
them and their environment. In addition, during the time growing,
children will frequently be encountered with circumstances where
demanding to socialize with other. It means children need to possess
good communication skill and be able to feel other’s feeling. Those
kinds of intelligent can be gained with teaching them co-operate.
On the other hand, kids will also experience with many problems or
conditions forcing them to do competition while getting bigger.
Instead of teaching about co-operate only, parents can enhance some
methods that are able to be used for making kids can compete with
other in future when they become teenager. But, there is a number of
problem caused by teaching kids competition if the teaching manner is
strongly taught, for example, they will have bad habit making them can
allow every way as long as it can make them become the best or the
winner.
In conclusion, both of teaching about co-operate and giving a sense of
competition are ideal for children in order to make them as useful
adults. But, still, parents should pay more attention on their method
of giving a sense of competition to children.
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Children who scientist researched having good ability in memorizing
are able to learn fast
Children whom scientist researched having good ability in memorizing
are able to learn fast
in order to children can grow as nice person
Description: 'in order to' is not used properly
teaching them co-operate.
teaching them co-operation.
parents can enhance some methods that are able to be used for making kids can compete with other
parents can enhance some methods that are able to be used for making kids competing with others
Sentence: Those kinds of intelligent can be gained with teaching them co-operate.
Description: The fragment of intelligent can is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace intelligent with adverb
a number of problem caused by teaching kids
a number of problems caused by teaching kids
they will have bad habit making them can allow every way
they will have bad habit making them on a wrong way
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 7 2
Read a good grammar book.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.0 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 7 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 14 15
No. of Words: 297 350
No. of Characters: 1501 1500
No. of Different Words: 164 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.151 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.054 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.706 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 104 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 78 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 57 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 35 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 21.214 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.946 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.5 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.361 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.576 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.168 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5