Even though globalization affects the world’s economies in a positive way, its negative side should not be forgotten. Discuss.
Globalization is changing all aspects of people around the globe considerably. While I am accepting its numerous positive impacts, its disadvantages are not totally negligible.
Undeniably, globalization brings nations together. Internet and e- commerce have made the end of time and space. Presently, anybody can exchange his or her culture and ideas with anybody at anytime anywhere, if within the circle of internet. Multinational companies offers more job opportunities, better products and services and boost the performance of local companies through competition. Due to business outsourcing a large number of skilled professionals especially, in IT field are enjoying high salary staying in their own countries. People can study, settle anywhere, they desire by following the rules of that country. Culture and language became similar and the world is shrinked in to a global village. For instance, we can see our youngsters are wearing Nike T-shirts and Addidas shoes, listening hip-hop music in their ipods and eat at K.F.C.
Nevertheless, we cannot keep a blind eye on its negative impacts on population. Due to business outsourcing local unemployment flourishes, this is recently happened in America. Multi-national companies destroyed the local market. Since the world became uniform in culture and language small languages and local cultures are diminished. Furthermore, the internet and social networking services like facebook and twitter, trim down the face-to-face communication. Developmental processes bring pollution, wastage and environmental damage with them. People, particularly, young generation is more attached to Western culture, fast foods and neglect their own culture and traditions. Besides, too much information from the internet make people more confused.
To conclude, though globalization is gaining ground all around the world, it is like a double-edged knife, which is having both pros and cons. We should be wise to choose the best out of it.
Is it better to discuss the both sides, pros and cons or discuss the given statement? ie, negative only, as it is not clearly mentioned to discuss both sides.
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Sentence: Multinational companies offers more job opportunities, better products and services and boost the performance of local companies through competition.
Description: The fragment companies offers more is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace offers with verb, base: uninflected present, imperative or infinitive
Sentence: Besides, too much information from the internet make people more confused.
Description: The fragment internet make people is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace make with verb, past tense
flaws:
No. of Words: 298 350
You need to focus more on negative side( maybe in two paragraphs ), though you can talk about the positive side in one paragraph.
It is on top list:
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Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 8.0 out of 9
Category: Excellent Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 2 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 20 15
No. of Words: 298 350
No. of Characters: 1639 1500
No. of Different Words: 202 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.155 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.5 4.6
Word Length SD: 3.047 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 133 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 106 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 76 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 45 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 14.9 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.421 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.3 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.259 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.433 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.072 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5