TPO40 - Integrated writing
According to the reading, humans cannot live on Venus du to its extreme and inhospitable condition, and provides some reasons for this claim. However, the professor considers all of the presented reasons in the reading fixable, and provide some ways to overcome the problems.
First, The passage writes that Venus' surface pressure is 90 times greater than earth's pressure, so it makes it impossible for any devices and humans to tolerate that massive pressure. In contrast to that, the speaker suggests that a spaceship floating on Venus' atmosphere, 50 kilometers above the surface, can fix the issue because the pressure is much lower on high altitudes than on its surface.
Second, the writing claims that Venus lacks water and oxygen, and the oxygen has to be imported to Venus from earth which is highly impractical, but the speaker asserts that water and oxygen can be created from chemicals like carbon dioxide and sulfur acid that are availabe in Venus. As the result, humans don't have to transfer oxygen to there.
Third, the the article says that a thick layer of carbon dixoide cloud reflects most of the sunlight, so it limits the use of solar power cells to produce electricity on the surface of Venus. On the contrary, the professor states that if we make a space station above the clouds, the problem can be handled easily because above the dense cloud layer, light shines well; eventhough, we can use the lights that is reflected by the clouds as a power and we can make solar panels that absorb lights from the reflcted light by the clouds and the shined photons by the sun.
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
Sentence: Third, the the article says that a thick layer of carbon dixoide cloud reflects most of the sunlight, so it limits the use of solar power cells to produce electricity on the surface of Venus.
Description: The token the is not usually followed by an article
Suggestion: Refer to the and the
Sentence: According to the reading, humans cannot live on Venus du to its extreme and inhospitable condition, and provides some reasons for this claim.
Error: du Suggestion: due
Sentence: Second, the writing claims that Venus lacks water and oxygen, and the oxygen has to be imported to Venus from earth which is highly impractical, but the speaker asserts that water and oxygen can be created from chemicals like carbon dioxide and sulfur acid that are availabe in Venus.
Error: availabe Suggestion: available
Sentence: Third, the the article says that a thick layer of carbon dixoide cloud reflects most of the sunlight, so it limits the use of solar power cells to produce electricity on the surface of Venus.
Error: dixoide Suggestion: ?
Sentence: On the contrary, the professor states that if we make a space station above the clouds, the problem can be handled easily because above the dense cloud layer, light shines well; eventhough, we can use the lights that is reflected by the clouds as a power and we can make solar panels that absorb lights from the reflcted light by the clouds and the shined photons by the sun.
Error: reflcted Suggestion: reflected
Error: eventhough Suggestion: No alternate word
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 24 in 30
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 1 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 5 2
No. of Sentences: 8 12
No. of Words: 275 250
No. of Characters: 1287 1200
No. of Different Words: 149 150
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.072 4.2
Average Word Length: 4.68 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.296 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 95 80
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 67 60
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 35 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 17 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 34.375 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 16.748 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.75 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.397 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.728 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.113 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 4
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 176, Rule ID: ALL_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'all the'.
Suggestion: all the
...claim. However, the professor considers all of the presented reasons in the reading fixabl...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 308, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: don't
...vailabe in Venus. As the result, humans dont have to transfer oxygen to there. Th...
^^^^
Line 7, column 8, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a word
Suggestion: the
... to transfer oxygen to there. Third, the the article says that a thick layer of carb...
^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 8, Rule ID: DT_DT[1]
Message: Maybe you need to remove one determiner so that only 'the' or 'the' is left.
Suggestion: the; the
... to transfer oxygen to there. Third, the the article says that a thick layer of carb...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, however, if, second, so, third, well, as to, in contrast, in contrast to, on the contrary
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 8.0 10.4613686534 76% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 6.0 5.04856512141 119% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 7.30242825607 151% => OK
Relative clauses : 12.0 12.0772626932 99% => OK
Pronoun: 20.0 22.412803532 89% => OK
Preposition: 34.0 30.3222958057 112% => OK
Nominalization: 2.0 5.01324503311 40% => More nominalization wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1328.0 1373.03311258 97% => OK
No of words: 274.0 270.72406181 101% => OK
Chars per words: 4.84671532847 5.08290768461 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.0685311056 4.04702891845 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.38804408294 2.5805825403 93% => OK
Unique words: 154.0 145.348785872 106% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.56204379562 0.540411800872 104% => OK
syllable_count: 413.1 419.366225166 99% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.55342163355 97% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 1.0 3.25607064018 31% => OK
Interrogative: 0.0 0.116997792494 0% => OK
Article: 7.0 8.23620309051 85% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 1.25165562914 80% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.51434878587 264% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 3.0 2.5761589404 116% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 8.0 13.0662251656 61% => OK
Sentence length: 34.0 21.2450331126 160% => OK
Sentence length SD: 90.6504274673 49.2860985944 184% => OK
Chars per sentence: 166.0 110.228320801 151% => OK
Words per sentence: 34.25 21.698381199 158% => OK
Discourse Markers: 12.625 7.06452816374 179% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.09492273731 98% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 4.19205298013 95% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 2.0 4.33554083885 46% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 4.45695364238 67% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.27373068433 70% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.397499776391 0.272083759551 146% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.148853287717 0.0996497079465 149% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0797067061475 0.0662205650399 120% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.207639136042 0.162205337803 128% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0824731203489 0.0443174109184 186% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 18.5 13.3589403974 138% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 45.43 53.8541721854 84% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 5.55761589404 56% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 15.4 11.0289183223 140% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.44 12.2367328918 93% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.64 8.42419426049 114% => OK
difficult_words: 75.0 63.6247240618 118% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 13.5 10.7273730684 126% => OK
gunning_fog: 15.6 10.498013245 149% => OK
text_standard: 16.0 11.2008830022 143% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.