Some people think that today, due to the intensive media coverage, the hero is more likely to be described as an intimate person who we find every day. However, it is not necessarily true. I believe the intensive media coverage enabled the society to find many heroes who were not easily detected before.
Admittedly, the intensive coverage of people allowed us to look more closely on their characters and personalities. Media often broadcast the great people's weird habit or weakness for the entertainment purpose. This makes us think that the great people are not much of a difference from us. However, the idolization of a person is not always necessary for us to feel that person as great. Rather, we are more impressed by the weakness of the hero since we can think them as a human who has a small disadvantage like everyone but achieved the great success.
Besides, the intensive coverage by the media enabled the ordinary people to become admired in our society. The news about people who saved or helped people are broadcasted many times. For example, we can see a fire fighter who saved many people against the fiery fire and the barber shop owner took care of the juveniles who were lost in the street. They are highly regarded as a hero of the society since they contributed to the society in the behind scenes. Likewise, thanks to the intensive coverage on the ordinary people by the media, they could become the heroes of the society.
Furthermore, the intensive coverage on the international figure also allowed foreigners to regard him or her as a hero of the international world. For instance, Aung San Suu Kyi is the international symbol of a nonviolent democratic movement. She did not surrender to the oppression under the authoritarian government of Myanmar for decades. For her conviction to the nonviolent democracy, international society gave her a peace prize several times and she also could gain the support not only from the the country but from the people all over the world. If there was no intensive coverage on the track of her non-violent movement for the democracy, she could not have become the hero of the international society.
To sum up, the intensive media coverage encouraged the society to regard more living man and woman as a hero, than the opposite. Ordinary people in the corners could be detected by the media that their courage and the benevolence could be highly respected in the society. Plus, the intensive figure on the international figure also made them as a new hero of the public. Therefore, it seems the erroneous to assert that the intensive media coverage prevented the emergence of a hero in the society.
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Essay evaluation report
an intimate person who we find every day.
an intimate person whom we find every day.
flaws:
The third argument is somehow duplicated to the second paragraph. we need some more contents for the disadvantages of intensive media coverage, like:
The rising of the mass media has certainly contributed to the death of heroes. for example, The intensive media coverage shortens or even deletes the physical as well as psychological distance. The media are especially good at exposing the private lives of famous people, who otherwise might become heroes. Finally, the media have the power to mass-produce celebrities, in which case none of them has the hope of becoming a hero.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 1 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 22 15
No. of Words: 455 350
No. of Characters: 2167 1500
No. of Different Words: 199 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.619 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.763 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.685 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 149 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 109 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 77 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 51 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 20.682 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.963 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.636 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.344 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.55 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.196 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 7, column 501, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a word
Suggestion: the
...so could gain the support not only from the the country but from the people all over th...
^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 501, Rule ID: DT_DT[1]
Message: Maybe you need to remove one determiner so that only 'the' or 'the' is left.
Suggestion: the; the
...so could gain the support not only from the the country but from the people all over th...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, besides, but, furthermore, however, if, likewise, look, so, therefore, for example, for instance, to sum up
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 19.5258426966 72% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 12.4196629213 56% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 14.8657303371 67% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 11.3162921348 97% => OK
Pronoun: 33.0 33.0505617978 100% => OK
Preposition: 57.0 58.6224719101 97% => OK
Nominalization: 10.0 12.9106741573 77% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2222.0 2235.4752809 99% => OK
No of words: 455.0 442.535393258 103% => OK
Chars per words: 4.88351648352 5.05705443957 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.61852021839 4.55969084622 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.757023504 2.79657885939 99% => OK
Unique words: 200.0 215.323595506 93% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.43956043956 0.4932671777 89% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 751.5 704.065955056 107% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59117977528 107% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 10.0 6.24550561798 160% => OK
Article: 8.0 4.99550561798 160% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.10617977528 64% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.77640449438 0% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.38483146067 23% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 20.2370786517 109% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 23.0359550562 87% => OK
Sentence length SD: 37.1158839714 60.3974514979 61% => OK
Chars per sentence: 101.0 118.986275619 85% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.6818181818 23.4991977007 88% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.13636363636 5.21951772744 98% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.97078651685 101% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 7.80617977528 26% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 17.0 10.2758426966 165% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 5.13820224719 39% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.83258426966 62% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.26622932463 0.243740707755 109% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0837302671865 0.0831039109588 101% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0752672250801 0.0758088955206 99% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.154591902744 0.150359130593 103% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0576175264462 0.0667264976115 86% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.9 14.1392134831 84% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 42.72 48.8420337079 87% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.3 12.1743820225 101% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.02 12.1639044944 91% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.58 8.38706741573 90% => OK
difficult_words: 85.0 100.480337079 85% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 11.8971910112 67% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 11.2143820225 89% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.7820224719 102% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.