Some people claim that what people it in many Western countries is unhealthy and that their diet is getting worse. Critics say these countries should change their diet. What are your opinions on this?
Some people share an opinion that most of Western countries' dwellers eat too much food that is harmful for their health. And this in turn deteriorates their diet. According to critics, these countries ought to change their nutrition.
As we all know, a typical Western diet mostly consists of unhealthy GM food and fast food. Especially in the USA and UK, junk food is an ordinary daily meal for them, as there plenty of most popular fast food chains there, such as Mac Donalds, KFC, Hardee's etc. The problem is that they don't attempt to recognise its inevitable effects. As a result, eating unhealthy food damages human's health and leads to some problems like overweight or even hardly-cured diseases. That is why, it is advisable to encourage them to change their diet at all. This certainly will make a big difference in their health. Although changing your diet is not so simple, the only thing required is a strong will-power, needed to force yourself to avoid junk food.
Furthermore, following the example of other healthy countries would also help. Healthy countries are those which contain a lot of green vegetables and fruits, rich in vitamin, food rich in carbohydrates in their permanent diet. As an example, Western countries could take more Eastern regions' diets. Actually, it depends on the individual's preferences.
In my opinion, we can't say they that only Western countries are facing this problem of an inappropriate diet. Nowadays, this issue is increasingly becoming worldwide. Moreover, the main point for Western countries is to make a change as long as it is not too late. And whatever change they make, they should make it beneficial for their well-being.
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- writing task 1 75
Sentence: In my opinion, we can't say they that only Western countries are facing this problem of an inappropriate diet.
Description: The tag a pronoun, personal, nominative, not 3rd person singular is not usually followed by that
Suggestion: Refer to they and that
Sentence: Especially in the USA and UK, junk food is an ordinary daily meal for them, as there plenty of most popular fast food chains there, such as Mac Donalds, KFC, Hardee's etc. The problem is that they don't attempt to recognise its inevitable effects.
Error: recognise Suggestion: No alternate word
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 7.0 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 1 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 1 2
No. of Sentences: 17 15
No. of Words: 281 350
No. of Characters: 1366 1500
No. of Different Words: 167 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.094 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.861 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.638 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 96 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 76 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 49 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 34 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 16.529 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.095 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.412 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.301 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.5 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.08 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5