The speaker who is the director of the Classical Shakespeare Theatre of Bardville suggests a new idea in the given letter. He suggests that the theatre should hold a new event named 'Shakespeare in the Park" upcoming summer with evidence. At a glance, it seems plausible and reasonable; however, closer scrutiny reveals that it rests in unsubstantiated assumptions that could be questioned in one of another way.
Firs and foremost, the speaker's suggestion lacks reliable data in the past of the theatre. He argued that the theater's profit and the audiences declining, yet he failed to show the correct number of data. He only insisted that there has been a 20 percent decline in the size of the average audience at the theater. But it could be possible that the number of recent visiting audience is increasing in the recent three years. If the number of recent guests increased, we could say the advertisement of the theater has been successful. In this regard, the director of the theater should suggest more precise and determined data of the audience of the theater. And if it is possible, to show pieces of data from other theater will be helpful since we could compare these data.
Besides, even if his idea about the declining number of the theater is true, we cannot get rid of the doubt about the solution of the problematic situation. In the given article, the director suggests that the theater should open a new event in the upcoming summer with the record from the nearby Avon Repertory Company's new promotion event named ' Free Plays in the Park'. Of course, this idea is interesting but it made a wrong analogy error. First of all, two company have different business models, the theater doing a show business yet the speaker does not give sufficient information about the referenced company. According to their different industry models, the workers of these group ought to have a different approaching method. Moreover, we cannot guarantee that similar events will work well in different regions. Every region has each ethnic cultures, so adapting an event from the other region without any doubt could be a dangerous attempt. Hence, the speaker is needed to suggest more details about the event he referenced.
Lastly, even though the event could be adaptable in Bardville, more researches are needed to be done to make proper profits. In the article, the speaker suggested that the referenced company made a 10 percent increase in their profit. It seems a great benefit to the company, but it lacks evidence about more clear data about income and expense. The sum of the profit made by income and expense. The total profit could be enhanced by the total income, yet if the company spent more budget on an event and promotion, it could be a loss for the company. Hence, we need more detailed economic information to make a proper decision.
In sum, the speaker's ideas seem proper at a glance, yet closer scrutiny shows the needs for more detailed information and closer research. If the speaker could show more reliable data and evidence, we could accept his ideas with grateful minds. However, before scrutinizing the required evidence from this article, we should take a more careful approach to the director's suggestion.
- TPO 1 Integrated writing 3
- At universities and colleges, sports and social activities are just as important as classes and libraries and should receive equal financial support. 76
- At universities and colleges, sports and social activities are just as important as classes and libraries and should receive equal financial support. 80
- Educating children is a more difficult task today than it was in the past because they spend so much time on cell phone, online games, and social networking Web site.Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. 90
- TPO 1 3
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 27 15
No. of Words: 547 350
No. of Characters: 2635 1500
No. of Different Words: 236 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.836 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.817 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.513 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 196 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 143 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 91 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 50 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 20.259 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.809 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.593 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.304 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.304 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.188 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 1 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...d be questioned in one of another way. Firs and foremost, the speakers suggesti...
^^^
Line 3, column 24, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'speakers'' or 'speaker's'?
Suggestion: speakers'; speaker's
...another way. Firs and foremost, the speakers suggestion lacks reliable data in the p...
^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ful since we could compare these data. Besides, even if his idea about the decl...
^^^
Line 5, column 347, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...rtory Companys new promotion event named Free Plays in the Park. Of course, this ...
^^
Line 6, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...details about the event he referenced. Lastly, even though the event could be a...
^^^
Line 8, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...information to make a proper decision. In sum, the speakers ideas seem proper a...
^^^
Line 9, column 362, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'directors'' or 'director's'?
Suggestion: directors'; director's
...uld take a more careful approach to the directors suggestion.
^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
besides, but, first, hence, however, if, lastly, moreover, so, well, of course, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 17.0 19.6327345309 87% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 20.0 12.9520958084 154% => OK
Conjunction : 17.0 11.1786427146 152% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 13.6137724551 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 38.0 28.8173652695 132% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 70.0 55.5748502994 126% => OK
Nominalization: 17.0 16.3942115768 104% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2721.0 2260.96107784 120% => OK
No of words: 549.0 441.139720559 124% => OK
Chars per words: 4.95628415301 5.12650576532 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.84053189512 4.56307096286 106% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.64095721807 2.78398813304 95% => OK
Unique words: 242.0 204.123752495 119% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.440801457195 0.468620217663 94% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 848.7 705.55239521 120% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 13.0 4.96107784431 262% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 11.0 8.76447105788 126% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 2.70958083832 185% => OK
Conjunction: 6.0 1.67365269461 358% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 10.0 4.22255489022 237% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 27.0 19.7664670659 137% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 22.8473053892 88% => OK
Sentence length SD: 34.4661023109 57.8364921388 60% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 100.777777778 119.503703932 84% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.3333333333 23.324526521 87% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.40740740741 5.70786347227 60% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 7.0 5.25449101796 133% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 8.20758483034 158% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 10.0 4.67664670659 214% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.112779634733 0.218282227539 52% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0356805321597 0.0743258471296 48% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0626070402373 0.0701772020484 89% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0720288579014 0.128457276422 56% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0666393843201 0.0628817314937 106% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.1 14.3799401198 84% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 59.64 48.3550499002 123% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 12.197005988 81% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.49 12.5979740519 91% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.96 8.32208582834 96% => OK
difficult_words: 116.0 98.500998004 118% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 12.3882235529 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 11.1389221557 90% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 11.9071856287 84% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.