The following appeared in a letter to the editor of Parson City's local newspaper.
In our region of Trillura, the majority of money spent on the schools that most students attend—the city-run public schools—comes from taxes that each city government collects. The region's cities differ, however, in the budgetary priority they give to public education. For example, both as a proportion of its overall tax revenues and in absolute terms, Parson City has recently spent almost twice as much per year as Blue City has for its public schools—even though both cities have about the same number of residents. Clearly, Parson City residents place a higher value on providing a good education in public schools than Blue City residents do.
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
According to the editor of parson city's local newspaper, the author argues that parson city residents place a higher value on providing a good education in public schools than blue city residents do. To buttress his argument, the author cites the following evidences: first, parson city has put twice as much per year as blue city for its public school; second, majority of money spent on schools from taxes each city government collects. while it might be true that parson emphasizes the significance of education and put more financial resources in public school, we cannot fully evaluate the argument due to incomplete evidences.
To begin with, the first piece of information the author needs to provide is the amount of money received from the societies in two cities. it is true that governments invest a large amount of money in public school, but the author fails to take other types of financial support into consideration. it is plausible that blue received considerable denotion from private supports or from alumnea donation, then there is less need for government to support the public schools, since money from private investments has been enough to compensate the total operation costs of running schools. In addition, it is likely that blue has much more private schools than parson, so that schools themselves can collect tuition from every student, thereby curtailing the validity of the argument. Unless both cities have the way amount of mony from other resources or methods, while parson has more from government, the argument itself is not convincing.
Moreover, the evidence that the author needs to offer is the number of students in two cities respectively. The author only privide information about number of residents. although these two cities have same number of residents, it does not mean their student numbers are also the same. In all likelihood, parson has more than twice number of students than blue, then both labor and material resources in blue are naturally less than those in parson. Additionally, to better evaluate the argument, the author ought to provide the exact amount of money invested by governments. although twice amount might seem not a small number, what if both proportion and absolute values are small? In this case, even if parson spent twice as much as blue, money might not differ significantly.
Last but not least, we should be offered more evidences of actions of residents. The conclusion that parson city residents place a higher value on providing a good education in public schools than blue city residents do is not convincing, because the author did not provide any support about what residents do. even though the statistics are persusive, they only represent behaviors or actions from government respects. we should also be informed about how family members pay attention to education. For instance, in individual level, every family in blue invests larger proportion of their income to education, then it is hastily to get the conclusion given in the letter. Not only money or financial supports are essential in education, but also time and efforts are equally crucial. In all likelihood, parents in blue city spend much more time with their children, including exercising together and helping with their homework, then the conclusion might not be justified. Without taking time and money of both individual and social level into consideration, we cannot readily get the conclusion.
To sum up, as it stands, the conclusion is relied on incomplete evidences. To better evaluate and strengthen the argument, the editor of newspaper should add the evidences as follows: first, the total amount money the schools receive and use in two cities; second, number of students in every public schools; finally, both time and financial efforts in individual levels.
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
argument 1 -- not exactly. 1. better to ask: how many tax payers in both cities. 2. about date: 'Parson City has recently spent almost twice...', so maybe last year, both cities put same money on education.
argument 2 -- OK
argument 3 -- OK
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 19 15
No. of Words: 620 350
No. of Characters: 3135 1500
No. of Different Words: 244 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.99 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.056 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.552 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 242 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 164 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 118 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 82 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 32.632 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 19.677 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.842 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.344 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.556 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.152 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 440, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: While
...om taxes each city government collects. while it might be true that parson emphasizes...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 141, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: It
...eived from the societies in two cities. it is true that governments invest a large...
^^
Line 3, column 300, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: It
...f financial support into consideration. it is plausible that blue received conside...
^^
Line 5, column 172, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Although
... information about number of residents. although these two cities have same number of re...
^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 577, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Although
...mount of money invested by governments. although twice amount might seem not a small num...
^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 421, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: We
...rs or actions from government respects. we should also be informed about how famil...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, finally, first, if, moreover, second, so, then, while, for instance, in addition, it is true, to begin with, to sum up
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 21.0 19.6327345309 107% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 12.9520958084 93% => OK
Conjunction : 17.0 11.1786427146 152% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 13.6137724551 59% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 31.0 28.8173652695 108% => OK
Preposition: 83.0 55.5748502994 149% => OK
Nominalization: 31.0 16.3942115768 189% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 3228.0 2260.96107784 143% => OK
No of words: 620.0 441.139720559 141% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.2064516129 5.12650576532 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.98996985923 4.56307096286 109% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.67502030101 2.78398813304 96% => OK
Unique words: 270.0 204.123752495 132% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.435483870968 0.468620217663 93% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 1001.7 705.55239521 142% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 9.0 4.96107784431 181% => OK
Article: 11.0 8.76447105788 126% => OK
Subordination: 11.0 2.70958083832 406% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 13.0 4.22255489022 308% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 25.0 19.7664670659 126% => OK
Sentence length: 24.0 22.8473053892 105% => OK
Sentence length SD: 62.8187742638 57.8364921388 109% => OK
Chars per sentence: 129.12 119.503703932 108% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.8 23.324526521 106% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.16 5.70786347227 90% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 5.25449101796 114% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 8.20758483034 171% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 6.88822355289 73% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.67664670659 128% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.290642165577 0.218282227539 133% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0799360180722 0.0743258471296 108% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0937867304547 0.0701772020484 134% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.179958133655 0.128457276422 140% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.120639511269 0.0628817314937 192% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.5 14.3799401198 108% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 47.12 48.3550499002 97% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.7 12.197005988 104% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.23 12.5979740519 105% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.16 8.32208582834 98% => OK
difficult_words: 131.0 98.500998004 133% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 19.0 12.3882235529 153% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 11.1389221557 104% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.9071856287 109% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Write the essay in 30 minutes.
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.