The following appeared in a letter to the editor of a Relannian newspaper.Industry analysts report that the number of dairy farms in Relanna has increased by 25 percent over the last decade. Also, recent innovations in milking technology make it possible

Essay topics:

The following appeared in a letter to the editor of a Relannian newspaper.

Industry analysts report that the number of dairy farms in Relanna has increased by 25 percent over the last decade. Also, recent innovations in milking technology make it possible for farmers to significantly increase the efficiency of the milking process, allowing them to collect more milk in less time with minimal human intervention. In fact, data from the Relannian Department of Agriculture indicate that labor costs at the majority of Relannian dairy farms are actually lower now than they were ten years ago. Despite increased efficiency and lower labor costs, a carton of cream—a dairy product made from milk—at the local food market costs twice as much as it did two years ago. The only explanation for this dramatic price increase is that farmers are inflating the price of cream to increase their profits.

The paragraph here talks about increase in dairy farms in Relanna and about the new milking techniques which cut the cost of labor, which in turn would decrease the cost of milk. On the contrary the price of cream which is made from milk is doubled over the last two years. From this they state that the farmers are inflating the price of cream to augment their profits.

Firstly in the reasoning the increase in price of cream is assumed to hike only due to the increase in milk. The reasoning here is flawed because though cream is made up of milk it has several other ingredients which effect its price. Packaging the cream and storing them will also cost a fortune for the producers of cream. When they sell it they add these costs including the labor costs with a little profit and sell it to them. so the rise in price of cream cannot be only due to increase in cost of milk , there are myriad of factors effecting it.

Secondly to make cream we need heat exchangers which need to work at high temperatures. machines work only if the surrounding environment is suitable to them or else there might be wear and tear in them. May be Relannian weather had extreme rains or bad weather which had stopped production of cream with which demand increased. As we know demand and price are directly proportional, it might be one of the reasons for the inflation in the price of cream.

The argument was talking about the new milking techniques which requires human intervention. Although this might decrease the labor cost but the we did not take into account the cost for maintaining the machines and for buying them. As a result of it there might be an increase in the price of the milk to cover their expenditure but not because they had just inflated the prices for lucrative purposes.

With these reasons I presume the argument stated is flawed and could have been cogent if there were details about the prices of the machines, working of cream producing factories and the weather.

Votes
Average: 5 (3 votes)
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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 7, column 433, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: So
...th a little profit and sell it to them. so the rise in price of cream cannot be on...
^^
Line 7, column 509, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
... be only due to increase in cost of milk , there are myriad of factors effecting i...
^^
Line 13, column 89, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Machines
...hich need to work at high temperatures. machines work only if the surrounding environmen...
^^^^^^^^
Line 19, column 142, Rule ID: DT_PRP[1]
Message: Possible typo. Did you mean 'the' or 'we'?
Suggestion: the; we
... this might decrease the labor cost but the we did not take into account the cost for ...
^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, firstly, if, may, second, secondly, so, talking about, as a result, on the contrary

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 18.0 19.6327345309 92% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 12.9520958084 85% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 11.1786427146 107% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 13.6137724551 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 27.0 28.8173652695 94% => OK
Preposition: 51.0 55.5748502994 92% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 16.3942115768 43% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1660.0 2260.96107784 73% => OK
No of words: 355.0 441.139720559 80% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.67605633803 5.12650576532 91% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.34067318298 4.56307096286 95% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.37475040051 2.78398813304 85% => OK
Unique words: 172.0 204.123752495 84% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.484507042254 0.468620217663 103% => OK
syllable_count: 495.0 705.55239521 70% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.59920159681 88% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 1.0 4.96107784431 20% => OK
Article: 3.0 8.76447105788 34% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.70958083832 148% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 16.0 19.7664670659 81% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 22.0 22.8473053892 96% => OK
Sentence length SD: 31.8757352856 57.8364921388 55% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 103.75 119.503703932 87% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.1875 23.324526521 95% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.3125 5.70786347227 111% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.25449101796 76% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 6.0 8.20758483034 73% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.67664670659 128% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0829369585109 0.218282227539 38% => The similarity between the topic and the content is low.
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0338677436646 0.0743258471296 46% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0378313062183 0.0701772020484 54% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0497526386232 0.128457276422 39% => Maybe some paragraphs are off the topic.
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0428364052118 0.0628817314937 68% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.7 14.3799401198 81% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 66.07 48.3550499002 137% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 12.197005988 78% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.86 12.5979740519 78% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.66 8.32208582834 92% => OK
difficult_words: 66.0 98.500998004 67% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 9.0 12.3882235529 73% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 11.1389221557 97% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 11.9071856287 84% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.

Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 40 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 14 15
No. of Words: 355 350
No. of Characters: 1604 1500
No. of Different Words: 166 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.341 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.518 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.316 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 89 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 73 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 46 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 26 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 25.357 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.69 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.714 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.39 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.629 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.171 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5