The following appeared in a magazine article about planning for retirement.
"Clearview should be a top choice for anyone seeking a place to retire, because it has spectacular natural beauty and a consistent climate. Another advantage is that housing costs in Clearview have fallen significantly during the past year, and taxes remain lower than those in neighboring towns. Moreover, Clearview's mayor promises many new programs to improve schools, streets, and public services. And best of all, retirees in Clearview can also expect excellent health care as they grow older, since the number of physicians in the area is far greater than the national average."
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
In the magazine article, the author advertises Clearview area to be among the top choice for elder people to make retirement plan. However, whether the statement holds true or not depends on the validity of the information provided by the author. There are three pieces of evidence need to be further explained or provided in details in order to increase the persuasiveness of the article.
First of all, information showed by the author that housing cost decreased the previous year and taxes remains lower comparing with the neighboring towns was not necessarily true. Take, for example, the housing cost of the past five years was much higher than the current cost, but only decreased in the last year due to stagnant sale in housing. If this is the case, the retirees are most likely to face higher overall housing price in comparison to the average price in the recent five years. Moreover, a similar type of assumption was make where the author claims taxes were lower comparing to the neighboring towns, but he or she does not state how much the taxes are or was in the neighborhood. It is only when the viewers are confirmed with the exact numbers that they can decide for themselves the housing price in Clearview is low or high.
Secondly, it is stated in the article that Clearview promises to provide new programs to improve schools, streets, and public services, which does not guarantee the usage from the retirees. The article advertises for retirees, but there is almost no need for further education or new programs with expensive laboratory room and equipment for elder people, unless they are social classes, or a place for them to hangout, then it could be a losing investment. Furthermore, retirees might include elder people with a spectrum of health problem, which if it is true, they are more likely to stay home and prefer better house condition and home care rather than road upgrading or restaurant expanding. Unless the author could proved that the majority of retirees are healthy enough, or interested enough to use the public services, these new programs are not likely to sell.
Last but not least, the article claims that Clearview has a plethora of physicians, leading to better health care, which is a fallacy in reasoning quantity over quality. A clear example is that no matter how many physicians operating in Clearview, if no one proves to be good enough to handle emergency situation such as late stage diabetes, choking, health stroke, then life would be at all time risk for residents in this area. In medical field, it is unethical to compare quality of this doctor over the other one, because when it comes to a life matter task, it is either the patient's life is saved or not. Further examination of the degree and quality of a physician in Clearview is required to confirm health safety for everyone, not just retirees in this area.
In conclusion, the article, as it stands now, is considerably specious due to it's reliance on multiple unwarranted assumptions. If the author is able to explain and provide evidence (perhaps in the form of systematic research study) for his claim, then it will be possible to fully evaluate the validity of the suggestion that retirees should move to Clearview area.
| Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
|---|---|---|---|
| 2019-11-02 | dvtien95 | 74 | view |
| 2019-08-27 | saloni.p | 66 | view |
| 2019-08-14 | Jethro Jiang | 35 | view |
| 2019-07-20 | Olga Kyriazi | 83 | view |
| 2019-06-24 | mreyk | 55 | view |
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.5 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 18 15
No. of Words: 553 350
No. of Characters: 2635 1500
No. of Different Words: 265 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.849 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.765 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.529 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 195 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 143 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 94 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 56 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 30.722 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.936 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.667 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.308 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.57 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.082 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 550, Rule ID: IF_IS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'is'?
Suggestion: is
...ith a spectrum of health problem, which if it is true, they are more likely to sta...
^^
Line 5, column 723, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[1]
Message: The verb 'could' requires the base form of the verb: 'prove'
Suggestion: prove
...rant expanding. Unless the author could proved that the majority of retirees are healt...
^^^^^^
Line 7, column 582, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'patients'' or 'patient's'?
Suggestion: patients'; patient's
...to a life matter task, it is either the patients life is saved or not. Further examinati...
^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, furthermore, however, if, moreover, second, secondly, so, then, for example, in conclusion, such as, first of all, it is true
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 33.0 19.6327345309 168% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 12.9520958084 69% => OK
Conjunction : 21.0 11.1786427146 188% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 13.6137724551 95% => OK
Pronoun: 30.0 28.8173652695 104% => OK
Preposition: 70.0 55.5748502994 126% => OK
Nominalization: 15.0 16.3942115768 91% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2704.0 2260.96107784 120% => OK
No of words: 553.0 441.139720559 125% => OK
Chars per words: 4.8896925859 5.12650576532 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.84932490483 4.56307096286 106% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.60694526572 2.78398813304 94% => OK
Unique words: 278.0 204.123752495 136% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.502712477396 0.468620217663 107% => OK
syllable_count: 854.1 705.55239521 121% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 4.96107784431 121% => OK
Article: 8.0 8.76447105788 91% => OK
Subordination: 7.0 2.70958083832 258% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 6.0 1.67365269461 358% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 19.7664670659 91% => OK
Sentence length: 30.0 22.8473053892 131% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 44.1367473783 57.8364921388 76% => OK
Chars per sentence: 150.222222222 119.503703932 126% => OK
Words per sentence: 30.7222222222 23.324526521 132% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.61111111111 5.70786347227 133% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.25449101796 57% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 8.20758483034 97% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 6.88822355289 87% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.67664670659 86% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.209516830429 0.218282227539 96% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0627458259103 0.0743258471296 84% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0616212044982 0.0701772020484 88% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.11294935105 0.128457276422 88% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0236206149582 0.0628817314937 38% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 17.0 14.3799401198 118% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 49.49 48.3550499002 102% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.8 12.197005988 113% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.67 12.5979740519 93% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.64 8.32208582834 104% => OK
difficult_words: 123.0 98.500998004 125% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 12.3882235529 93% => OK
gunning_fog: 14.0 11.1389221557 126% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 11.9071856287 118% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 83.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 5.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.