The following appeared in a memo from the director of student housing at Buckingham College.
"To serve the housing needs of our students, Buckingham College should build a number of new dormitories. Buckingham's enrollment is growing and, based on current trends, will double over the next 50 years, thus making existing dormitory space inadequate. Moreover, the average rent for an apartment in our town has risen in recent years. Consequently, students will find it increasingly difficult to afford off-campus housing. Finally, attractive new dormitories would make prospective students more likely to enroll at Buckingham."
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
The director of student housing at Buckingham College concludes by advising to build new dormitories to increase the number of students in future. He comes to this decision based on the current trend of increase in enrollment in the college, his future prediction and also the increase in average rent of apartment in the town. However, even the assertion made by the director be true, he must provide evidence to these three explanations in order to determine the credibility of the argument.
First of all, the director assumes that the current rate of increase in number of students will continue for next fifty years. It is possible that the subjects being provided in the college at present, coincide with the job availability; so, there has been increase in number of students. Since job demand is capricious, present jobs having high manpower demand may not have proportional demand in future and there may not be more students in future who want to pursue the field of study provided by the college. It is also possible that a similar college with similar or even more facility will be established nearby that might distribute the number of student to these two college decreasing new enrollment rate. If any of these are true, then the conclusion does not hold water.
Secondly, the director assumes that the increase in average rent for apartment in town also indicates the increase in rent of the local area of college. Perhaps the increase in rent is more in central and debonair area of town that has increased overall average. Further, the increase in rent might be of sophisticated and luxurious apartment where students are unlikely to live that doesn’t have impact on the apartment usually preferred by students. If any of these scenarios have merit, then the argument is significantly weakened.
Finally, the director assumes that increase in dormitories is a major factor that influences students to enroll in the college. Majority of students may have no regard for the condition of dormitory. Some students who prefer games might look towards the sports scope in the college and tenacity of college to win competitive games. There might also be the students who prefer better education and these students look for the number of faculty and their quality. The status of living space might be of less concern to them. If these are the actual cases, then the persuasiveness of the argument is hindered.
In conclusion, the argument, as it stands now, is considerably flawed due to its reliance on unwarranted assumptions. If the director of student housing is able to provide evidence to these claims (perhaps based on systematic study approach), then the viability of the argument can fully be determined.
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Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 20 15
No. of Words: 454 350
No. of Characters: 2227 1500
No. of Different Words: 198 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.616 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.905 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.664 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 166 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 137 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 96 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 42 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 22.7 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.584 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.8 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.332 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.385 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.122 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 2 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 137, Rule ID: IN_PAST[1]
Message: Did you mean: 'in the future'?
Suggestion: in the future
...ries to increase the number of students in future. He comes to this decision based on the...
^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, finally, first, however, if, look, may, second, secondly, so, then, in conclusion, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 21.0 19.6327345309 107% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 12.9520958084 93% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 11.1786427146 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 13.6137724551 95% => OK
Pronoun: 26.0 28.8173652695 90% => OK
Preposition: 74.0 55.5748502994 133% => OK
Nominalization: 18.0 16.3942115768 110% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2278.0 2260.96107784 101% => OK
No of words: 453.0 441.139720559 103% => OK
Chars per words: 5.02869757174 5.12650576532 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.61343653406 4.56307096286 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.73679052312 2.78398813304 98% => OK
Unique words: 202.0 204.123752495 99% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.44591611479 0.468620217663 95% => OK
syllable_count: 739.8 705.55239521 105% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 4.96107784431 101% => OK
Article: 7.0 8.76447105788 80% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 2.70958083832 221% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.22255489022 47% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 19.7664670659 101% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 22.8473053892 96% => OK
Sentence length SD: 46.1177568839 57.8364921388 80% => OK
Chars per sentence: 113.9 119.503703932 95% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.65 23.324526521 97% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.3 5.70786347227 93% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.25449101796 19% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 8.20758483034 171% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 6.88822355289 73% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.67664670659 21% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.236565415052 0.218282227539 108% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0789162187797 0.0743258471296 106% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.112780432379 0.0701772020484 161% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.14334311974 0.128457276422 112% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0866731472711 0.0628817314937 138% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.6 14.3799401198 95% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 49.15 48.3550499002 102% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 12.197005988 98% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.19 12.5979740519 97% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.32 8.32208582834 100% => OK
difficult_words: 103.0 98.500998004 105% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 13.5 12.3882235529 109% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 11.1389221557 97% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 11.9071856287 118% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.