The following appeared in a memo from the director of student housing at Buckingham College.
"To serve the housing needs of our students, Buckingham College should build a number of new dormitories. Buckingham's enrollment is growing and, based on current trends, will double over the next 50 years, thus making existing dormitory space inadequate. Moreover, the average rent for an apartment in our town has risen in recent years. Consequently, students will find it increasingly difficult to afford off-campus housing. Finally, attractive new dormitories would make prospective students more likely to enroll at Buckingham."
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
In the memo from the director of student housing at Buckingham College recommends that Buckingham college should build the number of new dormitories for the upcoming students. Director of student housing for supporting his statement, state that based on current enrolment trends of students, within the next 50 years there will be double enrolment in Buckingham college. Also, average rent in our town has risen in recent years so, this will conclude too difficult for students to afford off-campus housing. However before this recommendation can be properly evaluated , three questions must be answered.
First of all, Is Director of student housing assuming that all incoming student will live in dormitories or prefer dormitories? There is possible that incoming students can live in off-campus housing, maybe students will have to pay less rent then dormitory rent or they are getting cheap housing nearby college. Also, there is possibility that some students can live with parents so, definitely they will not live in dormitory and that will lead to off-campus housing and vacant dormitory. If either of these scenarios has merit, then conclusion drawn in the original argument is significantly weekend.
Secondly, Why director of housing not listing the facilities that student will get in dormitory? There is possibility that incoming students don’t like the dormitory facilities they can more prefer the off-campus facilities because of the off-housing facilities will be good and will be affordable for them. Perhaps, there is possibility that dormitory of college is not in city and that is located in far away from the city and the main college. So they have to travelled from college bus and students cannot prefer this and they will prefer off-campus housing which is well established in city. If the above statement is true, then the author statement does not hold water.
Finally, Why director of housing assuming that enrolment of students will double over next 50 years and assuming the rent of off-campus housing rising? There is possibility that enrolment of students will not double and maybe from upcoming year housing rent reduce and affordable for student’s. Further, maybe government also can introduce some benefits for students for reducing their living cost.
In conclusion the argument, as it stands now, it is considerably flawed due to its reliance on several assumption. If author is able to answer three questions above and offer some more evidence then it will be possible to fully evaluate the viability of the proposed implementation.
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Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 8 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 4 2
No. of Sentences: 17 15
No. of Words: 410 350
No. of Characters: 2121 1500
No. of Different Words: 177 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.5 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.173 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.711 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 159 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 133 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 96 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 57 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 24.118 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.729 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.765 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.355 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.415 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.104 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 2 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 509, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: However,
... students to afford off-campus housing. However before this recommendation can be prope...
^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 569, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...recommendation can be properly evaluated , three questions must be answered. Fir...
^^
Line 2, column 244, Rule ID: LESS_MORE_THEN[1]
Message: Did you mean 'than'?
Suggestion: than
...ybe students will have to pay less rent then dormitory rent or they are getting chea...
^^^^
Line 2, column 396, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...nts can live with parents so, definitely they will not live in dormitory and that...
^^
Line 2, column 597, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'weekended'.
Suggestion: weekended
... the original argument is significantly weekend. Secondly, Why director of housing not...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 96, Rule ID: MANY_NN[1]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun assumption seems to be countable; consider using: 'several assumptions'.
Suggestion: several assumptions
...siderably flawed due to its reliance on several assumption. If author is able to answer three ques...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 194, Rule ID: LESS_MORE_THEN[1]
Message: Did you mean 'than'?
Suggestion: than
...ions above and offer some more evidence then it will be possible to fully evaluate t...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, finally, first, however, if, may, second, secondly, so, then, well, in conclusion, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 20.0 19.6327345309 102% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 21.0 12.9520958084 162% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 11.1786427146 116% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 13.6137724551 95% => OK
Pronoun: 29.0 28.8173652695 101% => OK
Preposition: 56.0 55.5748502994 101% => OK
Nominalization: 15.0 16.3942115768 91% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2171.0 2260.96107784 96% => OK
No of words: 409.0 441.139720559 93% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.30806845966 5.12650576532 104% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.49708221141 4.56307096286 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.77662225949 2.78398813304 100% => OK
Unique words: 184.0 204.123752495 90% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.449877750611 0.468620217663 96% => OK
syllable_count: 670.5 705.55239521 95% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 2.0 4.96107784431 40% => OK
Article: 0.0 8.76447105788 0% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.70958083832 148% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 19.7664670659 91% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 22.8473053892 96% => OK
Sentence length SD: 36.7588067889 57.8364921388 64% => OK
Chars per sentence: 120.611111111 119.503703932 101% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.7222222222 23.324526521 97% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.61111111111 5.70786347227 98% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 7.0 5.25449101796 133% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 8.20758483034 97% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 6.88822355289 44% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.67664670659 150% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.320018372975 0.218282227539 147% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.121835314834 0.0743258471296 164% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.144790072069 0.0701772020484 206% => The coherence between sentences is low.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.183951576243 0.128457276422 143% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.130988870348 0.0628817314937 208% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.9 14.3799401198 104% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 49.15 48.3550499002 102% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 12.197005988 98% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.81 12.5979740519 110% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.97 8.32208582834 96% => OK
difficult_words: 84.0 98.500998004 85% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 12.3882235529 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 11.1389221557 97% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.9071856287 92% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.