The following appeared in a memorandum from the owner of Movies Galore, a chain of movie-rental stores.
"In order to stop the recent decline in our profits, we must reduce operating expenses at Movies Galore's ten movie-rental stores. Since we are famous for our special bargains, raising our rental prices is not a viable way to improve profits. Last month our store in downtown Marston significantly decreased its operating expenses by closing at 6:00 P.M. rather than 9:00 P.M. and by reducing its stock by eliminating all movies released more than five years ago. By implementing similar changes in our other stores, Movies Galore can increase profits without jeopardizing our reputation for offering great movies at low prices."
Write a response in which you examine the stated and/or unstated assumptions of the argument. Be sure to explain how the argument depends on these assumptions and what the implications are for the argument if the assumptions prove unwarranted.
In the above memorandum, the author assumed that to be more lucrative they should decrease operating expenses by closing at 6.00 P.M. instead of 9.00 P.M. and stop broadcasting movies more than 5 years ago. The author’s assumption is based upon the premise that their store in downtown was aggrandized their profit by closing 3 hours earlier and eliminating all the movies, released more than 5 years ago. However, before the author’s assumption is fully evaluated three questions must be answered.
Firstly, the author assumed that they should not raise their rental prices to improve profitability without any reliable evidence. Maybe people do not want that. There is a possibility that nearly owners of the similar business are already raised their prices and they are not facing any predicament from the people. As their prices are being raised the people may be willing to pay high rental prices. So increasing rental price may be a good idea. Perhaps movie-going people’s aptitude for the other things. Perhaps they want to reduce waiting time before the movie or they may want to have a parking allotment. If anyone of the above scenarios is true then the author’s assumption is seriously unwarranted.
Secondly, the author assumes that since last month their store downtown Marston significantly increased profitability by reducing operating expenses, and they should follow a similar strategy for other places. In other words, the author uses circumstances from one place to generalization or prediction about the others without any justifiable evidence. Maybe other places are completely different than downtown Marston. Perhaps most of the people in downtown Marston are young people or elderly people, on the other hand, most people in the other town are office-going people and they usually get out of their office after 6.00 P.M. therefore, closing theatre at 6.00 PM will not be much of a lucrative idea. There is a possibility that people in the other town may prefer older movies. Maybe most of the people in downtown Marston are young people and they prefer to watch newly released movies, on the other hand in the other town most people are retired people and they have a penchant for older movies. If anyone of the above scenarios is true then the author’s assumption is built unreliably.
Thirdly, the author assumed that by shorten operating expenses and reducing stock will improve the profitability without any proper evidence. Maybe doing so will jeopardize their reputation. Maybe people want to see movies with lower prices. There is a possibility that most of their customers belong to middle-class families, then raising fares may not be that much help. People may not comply with that idea. If this scenario is true then the author’s assumption is seriously unwarranted.
In the conclusion, the argument as it stands now is considerably flawed due to its reliance on several unwarranted assumptions. If the author is able to answer the three questions above and offer more evidence(perhaps in the form of a systematic research study), then it will be possible to fully evaluate the viability of the proposed assumption that they will be profitable if they reduce operating expenses and broadcast recent movies without blemishing the reputation.
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Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 9 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 10 2
No. of Sentences: 26 15
No. of Words: 531 350
No. of Characters: 2698 1500
No. of Different Words: 222 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.8 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.081 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.673 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 204 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 138 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 99 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 61 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 20.423 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 13.036 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.692 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.311 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.443 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.107 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 318, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “As” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...facing any predicament from the people. As their prices are being raised the peopl...
^^
Line 3, column 615, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “If” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...y may want to have a parking allotment. If anyone of the above scenarios is true t...
^^
Line 5, column 399, Rule ID: RATHER_THEN[2]
Message: Did you mean 'different 'from''? 'Different than' is often considered colloquial style.
Suggestion: from
...e other places are completely different than downtown Marston. Perhaps most of the p...
^^^^
Line 5, column 1009, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “If” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
... they have a penchant for older movies. If anyone of the above scenarios is true t...
^^
Line 7, column 412, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “If” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
.... People may not comply with that idea. If this scenario is true then the author’s...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
first, firstly, however, if, may, second, secondly, so, then, therefore, third, thirdly, in other words, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 31.0 19.6327345309 158% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 15.0 12.9520958084 116% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 11.1786427146 116% => OK
Relative clauses : 12.0 13.6137724551 88% => OK
Pronoun: 36.0 28.8173652695 125% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 60.0 55.5748502994 108% => OK
Nominalization: 17.0 16.3942115768 104% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2765.0 2260.96107784 122% => OK
No of words: 531.0 441.139720559 120% => OK
Chars per words: 5.20715630885 5.12650576532 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.80035803286 4.56307096286 105% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.77079335141 2.78398813304 100% => OK
Unique words: 227.0 204.123752495 111% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.427495291902 0.468620217663 91% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 857.7 705.55239521 122% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 0.0 4.96107784431 0% => OK
Article: 7.0 8.76447105788 80% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 2.70958083832 221% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.22255489022 166% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 26.0 19.7664670659 132% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 22.8473053892 88% => OK
Sentence length SD: 77.0885144055 57.8364921388 133% => OK
Chars per sentence: 106.346153846 119.503703932 89% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.4230769231 23.324526521 88% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.69230769231 5.70786347227 82% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 5.25449101796 95% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 8.20758483034 158% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 6.88822355289 73% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 8.0 4.67664670659 171% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.135404325103 0.218282227539 62% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0419197856736 0.0743258471296 56% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0487211317262 0.0701772020484 69% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0904421495421 0.128457276422 70% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.02922874372 0.0628817314937 46% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.3 14.3799401198 92% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 51.18 48.3550499002 106% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 12.197005988 91% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.94 12.5979740519 103% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.87 8.32208582834 95% => OK
difficult_words: 109.0 98.500998004 111% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 12.3882235529 113% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 11.1389221557 90% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 11.9071856287 118% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.